Imingxunya emi-4 yoNxibelelwano oluNgqubana oluPhezulu kubuDlelwane

Umbhali: Louise Ward
Umhla Wokudalwa: 11 Eyomdumba 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 1 Eyekhala 2024
Anonim
Imingxunya emi-4 yoNxibelelwano oluNgqubana oluPhezulu kubuDlelwane - I-Psychology
Imingxunya emi-4 yoNxibelelwano oluNgqubana oluPhezulu kubuDlelwane - I-Psychology

Umxholo

“Ukuxabana nawe kufana nokubanjwa. Yonke into endiyithethayo, inako kwaye iya kusetyenziswa nxamnye nam. Ayinamsebenzi into endiyithethayo okanye endiyenzayo, usoloko ujonge izinto ezimbi, okanye ugxeka, okanye ugweba, okanye uphelelwe lithemba! ”

Wakhe wacinga okanye waziva ngoluhlobo? Okanye ngaba iqabane lakho likhe lakhalaza ngawe ngendlela efanayo? Umzuzu wenyaniso: njengonyango lwezibini, njengombukeli wobudlelwane bomnye umntu, ezi ntlobo zeengxelo zinzima kakhulu ukuhlalutya ngokungachanekanga kwaye zinike ingxelo efanelekileyo.

Ukwahluka kwezimvo okanye ukuhlaselwa buqu

Yiyo le nto: Ngaba nyhani ngulowo uthumela lo myalezo “usoloko egxeka, egxeka, egweba okanye engenathemba?”

Ngaba umamkeli uye wabhencwa kuninzi lwale miyalezo ekukhuleni kwakhe kangangokuba bakhulise ubuntununtunu kuyo nayiphi na into enokuthi ifumaneke njengokwahluka kwezimvo okanye ukugxeka okwakhayo kwaye bahlala bekubona njengokuhlaselwa buqu?


Okanye ngaba yinto encinci yazo zombini? Ndiqinisekile ukuba uvile ukuba ngokungakhathali sithambekisela kwiintlobo zabantu esibaqhelileyo, nangona zisenokungasikhokeleli kubudlelwane obuphilileyo.

Ukuphula umjikelo okhohlakeleyo, ongenampilo

Umzekelo, ukuba sikhule sinabazali abagxekayo, siya kutsaleleka kumaqabane abalulekileyo. Kodwa ke siyakuyibona yonke ingxelo yabo njengezingalunganga kwaye sikhathazeke ngokwenene xa besigxeka. Ngaba inokuba ngumjikelo okhohlakeleyo, ongenampilo!

Ukuqonda oku kuguquka kubudlelwane bakho kubaluleke kakhulu. Phantse anikwazi ukuqhubela phambili nide niyiqonde ipateni eyodwa yokunxibelelana. Kwaye okona kubaluleke kakhulu, uthatha isigqibo sokungazinzisi ubudlelwane obuphakamileyo bembambano.

Nazi iingozi ezi-5 zokwamkela nje ukungqubana okuninzi kubudlelwane bakho

1. Yonyusa ngokubonakalayo amathuba okwahlukana okanye oqhawulo-mtshato


Izifundo zophando kunye neencwadi ezininzi zonyango ziye zafikelela kwisigqibo esifanayo.

Ukuqhawula umtshato okanye ukungonwabanga kwabantu abatshatileyo babonisa unxibelelwano olubi ngakumbi kunye neemvakalelo ezingalunganga njengoko kulinganiswa ngumyinge wemihla ngemihla wokunxibelelana okungalunganga.
uninzi lweendlela zokuziphatha zonxibelelwano ezingalunganga.

Aba baxelelanayo into abayenzayo engalunganga, ukukhalaza, ukugxeka, ukugxeka, ukuthetha phantsi, kwaye ngokubanzi awumenzi omnye umntu azive elungile.

Babeneendlela ezimbalwa zokuziphatha zonxibelelwano ezintle njengokuncoma, ukuxelelana into abayenzayo ngokulungileyo, ukuvumelana, ukuhleka, ukusebenzisa uburharha, ukuncuma, nokuthetha ngokulula nje "ndiyacela" kwaye "enkosi."

2. Idlula kwintlungu yentliziyo kunye nokungasebenzi kakuhle kubantwana bakho

Unxibelelwano yinkqubo entsonkothileyo yengqondo, yeemvakalelo, kunye neenkqubo zokunxibelelana eziqala ekuzalweni kwaye ziqhubeke ebomini bethu bonke, zihlala ziguquka kwaye ziguqukela kunxibelelwano ngalunye ekufuneka lulandelwe (nabazali bethu, ootitshala, abacebisi, abahlobo, amaqabane, abaphathi, abasebenza nabo, kunye nabathengi).


Unxibelelwano alungobuchule nje kuphela; yinkqubo eyahlukeneyo eyahlukeneyo edlulela kootatomkhulu ukuya kubazali, kubantwana, nakwizizukulwana ezizayo.

Izibini ezingavumelaniyo zizisa imithwalo yazo eyahlukeneyo kwaye xa zinxibelelana, zenza indlela eyahlukileyo, yokutyikitya yokuzibandakanya kunye nokunxibelelana. Bahlala bephinda iipateni ezifanayo, ezisebenzayo nezingasebenziyo, abazibonileyo bekhula.

Into enomdla kukuba abayiqondi ukuba ivela phi indlela yonxibelelwano; basola ngokulula kwaye babeke ukugxila kwenye: “Iqabane lam liyacaphukisa. Andikwazi ukuyinceda, kodwa ndenze impoxo kwaye ndigxeke. ”

Abantwana bakho baya kungqina indlela yakho yonxibelelwano eyimodeli, baya kuyiphinda, ingabi nawe kuphela (ekhathaza kakhulu) kodwa nakubudlelwane babo.

Jonga kwakhona: Yintoni ukungqubana kobudlelwane?

3. Akukho nto ivelayo ekusombululeni iingxaki

Yisetyhula nje, amandla okutsala amandla, imfumba engenamveliso yokunxibelelana kokuqhekeka okwenza ukuba niziva nobabini.

Izibini ezingaboni ngasonye zihlala zibanjwa kumjikelo wokuhleba, wokuchaswa, kunye neemvakalelo zokubanjiswa.

Bajolise kukwahluka kwabo, endaweni yokubathoba. Okubaluleke ngakumbi, bajonga lo mahluko njengokuzinza, ukungagungqi, kunye nokusilela ekubekekeni ityala kumaqabane abo.

Ezi zibini zinesakhono esilinganiselweyo sokusombulula ingxaki kunye nokusebenza kunye njengeqela. Bahlala beveza umsindo kunokuba babonakalise iimvakalelo zobuhlungu (abo banxibelelana ngobundlongondlongo). Okanye baya kurhoxa endaweni yokubonisa ukuphoxeka kumaqabane abo (abonxibelelwano nje).

Oku kuhlala kukhokelela kwimpembelelo yeemvakalelo ezinamandla ezijikeleza ixesha elifutshane ukukwazi ukuchonga nokuphendula ngokufanelekileyo kumthombo woxinzelelo. Ngapha koko, impendulo kwingxaki iba ngumthombo wobunzima ngokwayo ekhokelela kumjikelo wobubi wobunzima obungapheliyo ekuhambeni kwexesha.

Omnye wabathengi bam owayekhathazeke kakhulu liqabane lakhe, wandibuza lo mbuzo kanye: “Nguwuphi oyena mbi, xa iqabane lakho lisenza into esisidenge okanye xa lisenza ngathi lijerikha? Ingqondo yam ngaphambili, ke bendilungele ukuphendula okwam. Ndaphendula ndathi: “Ngokunyaniseka, bobabini bayacaphukisa, kodwa kubonakala ngathi ndiyakhawuleza ukukhawuleza.

Xa eyi-jerk, ndibonakala ngathi ndiyawufaka ngaphakathi umyalezo wakhe kunye nokuziphatha kwakhe okukhohlakeleyo, kwaye ndiziphindise iimpendulo zakhe eziphindaphindeneyo entlokweni yam. Emva koko ndiye ndizibeke kwezinye iimeko kwaye into elandelayo endiyaziyo, ndinayo yonke imovie entlokweni yam ngendlela andicaphukela ngayo, kwaye nendlela andicaphukela ngayo. ”

4. Ikubeka kwiingxoxo ezingaphumeleliyo zexesha elizayo

Umngcipheko omkhulu wokudala le patheni kukuba, ekugqibeleni, ixesha nexesha, asikhumbuli izinto okanye iinkcukacha zomlo othile, kodwa sikhumbula iimvakalelo ezinamandla zokwenzakaliswa ngomnye umntu. Siza kuqhubeka nokuqokelela zonke ezi mvakalelo.

Ngexesha elithile, ezi mvakalelo zijika zibe kulindelo. Silindele nantoni na eyenziwa ngomnye umntu ukuba yenzakalise, ikhathaze, icaphukise, isisidenge, ingakhathali, ithethe, ingakhathali, njl.

Ungayila kwaye ugcwalise okushiyekileyo, kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo ayilunganga. Ngexesha elizayo xa kusenzeka, silindele imvakalelo ngaphambi kokuba siziqhubele phambili izibakala. Ulusu lwethu luyakhasa ngolindelo lweemvakalelo ezimbi.

5. Siyayibona kwaye siyive isiza ngendlela yethu

Siyavala ngaphambi kokuba siqonde ukuba omnye umntu unyanisile okanye akalunganga, ngoko ke akukho thuba lengxoxo efanelekileyo kuba sele sicaphukile ngaphambi kokuba siqale ukuthetha.

Into elandelayo esiyaziyo, sihamba kwaye sinyathela sijikeleza indlu sinomsindo omnye komnye singazi ukuba sinomsindo wantoni.

Akukho nto intle malunga nobudlelwane obuphakamileyo (mhlawumbi isini sokwenza, kodwa ayisiyiyo le nto uninzi lwezibini zixela). Ubudlelwane kufuneka bube ngumthombo wenkxaso, intuthuzelo, ukwakha omnye nomnye, ukusombulula iingxaki, kwaye uninzi lwako konke ukukhula. umjikelezo okhohlakeleyo, ongenampilo

Isenokungabi shushu kwaye ingabinangqondo ngalo lonke ixesha, kodwa kufanele ukuba ibe lelona xesha lininzi; ukuba oko akunakwenzeka, ubuncinci khetha umhlaba ongathathi hlangothi. Esi sisiqalo esihle!