Izizathu ezili-10 zokuba kutheni kungalunganga ukuthanda umntu kakhulu

Umbhali: John Stephens
Umhla Wokudalwa: 2 Eyomqungu 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 1 Eyekhala 2024
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Kuyaqondakala ukuba sonke siqala ebomini sifuna ukuziva sikhuselekile, sithandwa, kwaye samkelwe. Kukwindalo yethu esisiseko ukufuna ukhuseleko kunye nokufuna ukunika kunye nokwamkela uthando. Abanye bethu bafumanisa ukuba eyona ndlela yokwenza oku kukubeka ecaleni izinto esizifunayo okanye esizivayo kwaye sivumele iimfuno zomnye umntu ukuba zihambe phambili.

Ngelixa oku kunokusebenza okwethutyana, ayizinzanga kuba, ngokuhamba kwexesha, inzondo iyakha xa siqhubeka ukunika uthando kwaye singalufumani uthando kunye nokukhathalela imbuyekezo.

Kodwa uthando lukhulu kangakanani? Masithathe umzekelo.

Umzekelo, uMelissa, oneminyaka engama-43, wahlala emtshatweni uSteve, oneminyaka engama-45, iminyaka elishumi kwaye waqhubeka nokukhulisa kwaye wazama ukumtshintsha de waqala ukuzibona edandathekile emva kokuzalwa konyana wabo, kwaye iimfuno zakhe zazingahoywa nguSteve.


UMelissa ukubeka ngolu hlobo: “Kuxa ndandinonyana wam kuphela apho ndaye ndabona khona ukuba iimfuno zam zingahoywa, kwaye ukuzithemba kwam kufikelela ezantsi. USteve uza ekhaya alindele ukuba ndimlinde ndibuze malunga nosuku lwakhe, ngaphandle kokucinga ukuba ndilande usana lwethu oluyinkwenkwe ekukhathaleleni abantwana kwiyure engaphambili kwaye nam ndifuna uthando nenkxaso. ”

Kutheni abantu bemthanda kakhulu umntu

Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuthanda umntu kakhulu? Ngaba ungamthanda umntu kakhulu

Ewe, ewe. Ukuthanda umntu kakhulu kangangokuba kubuhlungu kunokwenzeka, kwaye kukho izizathu zokuba kutheni abantu bezonwabisa ngaloo nto.

Esona sizathu siphambili sokuba abantu bathande ukuthanda kakhulu kulwalamano kukuba baziva bengafanelekanga. Xa siziva sinesiphene okanye singathandeki, sinokungazithembi iinjongo zabanye zokusinika okanye ukusenzela izinto-okanye ukubuyisela iimvakalelo zothando.

Mhlawumbi ukhulele kusapho apho wawungumgcini okanye ujolise ngakumbi ekonwabiseni abanye. Mhlawumbi ude waziva ukuba kufuneka ube kwisimo esihle ngaphandle kwezona mvakalelo zakho zokwenyani, ke uye waba sisiyolo sabantu.


Umzekelo, amantombazana ahlala ekhuliswa ukuba avakalise ilizwi lawo langaphakathi kwaye oku kungabeka inqanaba lobudlelwane obukwicala elinye kuba bengazithembi ngokwabo. Gcina ukhumbula ukuba ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo ayikokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo.

Abantu abaninzi bathanda kakhulu kuba boyika ukuba bodwa okanye baziva benoxanduva kulonwabo lwamaqabane abo. Bahlala begeza uthando olugqithisileyo ngokubeka iimfuno zamaqabane abo ngaphambi kwezabo.

Ngokomlobi uAllison Pescosolido, MA,

“Ayikho into ephelisa ukuzithemba okukhawulezileyo njengobuhlobo obungenampilo. Abasetyhini abaninzi bahlala kwimitshato engenampilo kuba beqinisekile ukuba le yinto abafanele ukuyifumana. ”

Ngamanye amaxesha, akukho sidingo sokushiya ubudlelwane kuba ubudlelwane bunokuphilisa ukuba abantu bazimisele ukutshintsha amandla. Kodwa ukuze uphilise iphethini engenampilo yokuxhomekeka kwikhowudi, kuyanceda ukuqonda ukuba kutheni ingelilo umbono olungileyo ukuthanda kakhulu.


Izizathu ezili-10 zokuba kutheni kungalunganga ukuthanda umntu kakhulu

Ngaba akunampilo ukuthanda umntu kakhulu? Kukho ingozi ebalulekileyo ekuthandeni umntu kakhulu. Ukuthanda kakhulu kunokulungisa ubuntu bomntu kwaye kuchaphazele ulwalamano ngendlela engeyiyo.

1. Unokuhlawula ngaphantsi kokufaneleyo

Ugqibela ngokuhlala ungaphantsi kwento ekufaneleyo kwaye uziva kulungile ukulalanisa kunokulinda ukungaqiniseki. Uloyiko lwakho lunokukuyekisa ukucela uthando, nokuba iimfuno zakho azifezekiswa, kuba uyoyika ukuba wedwa kwaye unexhala lokuba awuzukutshata ngonaphakade.

2. Awuyi kulufumana ulwalamano lokwenyani

Ukuba sesichengeni kwaye ubuze into oyifunayo kukhuthaza ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo. Ngokuthanda kakhulu, uyakwenza inkohliso yokusondela kunye nolawulo, kodwa ayizukuzisa uthando. Ingcali ngokuxhomekeka kubuchwephesha uDarlene Lancer ubhala athi:

“Ukuba sesichengeni kuvumela abanye abantu ukuba basibone kwaye banxibelelane nathi. Ukufumana kuvula iinxalenye zethu ezikulangazelela ukuba zibonwe kwaye ziqondwe. Kusenza sithandane xa sisamkela ngokwenyani. ”

3. Konakalisa ukuzithemba kwakho

Ukuba ulwalamano oluxhaphazayo ngokweemvakalelo okanye ngokwasemzimbeni, luya kuyiphelisa indlela oziva ngayo.

Unokuyifihla le nto kusapho okanye kubahlobo ngenxa yeentloni okanye imiba yokuxhomekeka kwikhowudi- ukubeka iimfuno zeqabane lakho ngaphambi kwezakho. Ukuthanda kakhulu nokuba kubudlelwane obunamacala amabini kunokuhlisa ukuzithemba kwakho ngokuhamba kwexesha.

4. Uya kudibana nomnye umntu kwaye uzilahle

Kuba iqabane lakho alikwazi okanye alizimisele ukukunika uthando olukufaneleyo-unokufaka komnye umntu ukuze ulungiselele okulindelweyo, iimfuno, okanye iminqweno kwaye uzincame kakhulu. Ekugqibeleni, uya kuziva uthotyiwe kwaye ulahlekelwe sisazisi.

5. Uya kuba sisizwana esithandekayo

Xa uthanda umntu kakhulu, ungaya ngaphezulu nangaphaya ukonwaba kwabanye. Unokukuphepha ukujongana neqabane lakho malunga nemicimbi ebalulekileyo kuba ujolise kakhulu kwiimfuno zabo okanye ukhathazeke ngakumbi malunga neemvakalelo zeqabane lakho kunezakho.

6. Ukuchaza ukuzixabisa kwakho kwabanye kukhokelela ekuzigwebeni okungalunganga

Ngaba ukhathalele kakhulu ukuba abanye bacinga ntoni ngawe? Ukuba uziva ungathandwa kwaye uhlonitshwa liqabane lakho kodwa uthanda umntu kakhulu, ungazigxeka kwaye uziqaphele izigqibo zakho.

Jonga le vidiyo apho uNiko Everett abelana ngebali lakhe kwaye anike isifundo ekwakheni ukuzixabisa nokuzazi.

7. Ungazihoyi iiflegi ezibomvu

Iiflegi ezibomvu ziyimpawu ezicacileyo zokuba ubuhlakani bunokungathembeki kunye nentembeko kuba iqabane ojongana nalo lisenokungakulungeli. Xa uthanda umntu kakhulu, unokungahoyi ukunganyaniseki kweqabane, ukuba nezinto, okanye utyekelo lomona ngenxa yokuba uyala ukujongana nenyani.

8.Usenokungahoyi nokuzikhathalela kwakho

Xa uthanda umntu kakhulu, uziva ngathi uyazingca ukuba uyazikhathalela. Ukhokelela kulo lonke uthando lwakho kunye nokhathalelo kwiqabane lakho kwaye uqale ngokubabeka phambili ngaphezulu ngokwakho, kwaye uqala ukufumana le ndlela ichanekile kwaye iyinyani.

9. Uya kudala imida ehlwempuzekileyo

Oku kunokuthetha ukuba unengxaki yokuthi "hayi" kwizicelo zabanye okanye uvumele abanye ukuba basebenzise wena. Xa uthanda kakhulu, uthatha uxanduva lwezenzo kunye neemvakalelo zeqabane lakho.

Imida engafanelekanga enjalo evela kuthando oluninzi inokukhokelela kubudlelwane obuxhaphazayo.

10. Unokuhlala unqwenela kwaye unethemba lokuba iqabane lakho liyakutshintsha

Isidingo sakho sokuzitshintsha sinokuba likhoboka. Ngaphandle kobungqina obuchasene noko, uxhoma intloko entlabathini. Unethemba lokuba baya kutshintsha ngelixa behlala kubudlelwane obunetyhefu obugcwele iipateni zobudlelwane obungenampilo.

Iingcebiso malunga nentsebenziswano eyonwabisayo

Ke, ungathandi kangakanani? Ungayeka njani ukuthanda umntu kakhulu?

Ukuze waphule ipateni yokuthanda kakhulu kubudlelwane, licebo elilungileyo ukuzifundisa ngokwakho ukuba ubudlelwane obusempilweni bubukeka njani. Ngaphandle kokujonga abahlobo bakho (okanye oogxa bakho) abanabo, iimfihlelo zentsebenziswano eyonwabileyo zilula kakhulu:

  1. Ukuhloniphana, uthando kunye nokubonisa izimbo zothando
  2. Unxibelelwano oluthembekileyo nolungafihliyo nokuba sesichengeni
  3. Ukudlala kunye noburharha
  4. Ukufumaneka ngokweemvakalelo ngawo omabini amaqabane kwaye umntu ngamnye ulawula izinto zakhe
  5. Ukuphindaphinda oko kuthetha ukunika kunye nokwamkela uthando
  6. Ukuxhomekeka okunempilo-ukukwazi ukuxhomekeka kwiqabane lakho ngaphandle kokuxhomekeka komnye komnye
  7. Amava ekwabelwana ngawo kunye nombono wekamva lakho
  8. Ukunyaniseka nokubonisa yonke imihla
  9. Ukungamangaleli iqabane lakho ngento ekugulayo
  10. Ukuba ngumntu wakho kwaye ungoyiki ukuba wedwa

Ukuba ufuna ukutshintsha ipateni yokuthanda iqabane kakhulu, mamela ilizwi lakho elingaphakathi. Kukangaphi usitsho, “bendisazi ukuba izinto ziyothusa? Kutheni ndingazithembanga ngokubuza into endiyifunayo okanye ndihambe kwangoko? ”

Kutheni le nto singaliphulaphuli elo lizwi langaphakathi ... intuition yethu? Kuba ukwenza njalo kunokuthetha ukuba senze olunye ukhetho olubi. Kwaye ayiziva ilungile. Sikholisa ukuthethelela indlela esiziphethe ngayo, silungelelanise, kwaye singahoyi izinto ezithile kuba sifuna nje ukuba kubudlelwane.

Kula maxesha angxamisekileyo kunye neemvakalelo, asifuni kuma kwaye sivavanye iiflegi ezibomvu. Endaweni yoko, sanxiba iiglasi zethu ezinombala we rose, sahamba. Endaweni yokuba ulahle kude iiglasi kwaye uthembele amathumbu akho.

Yise kude

Ukuba ulwalamano lwakho lubangela ukuba uzive uxhalabile kwaye uhlala uthandabuza indlela oziva ngayo, inokuba icala elinye kwaye ayinampilo. Kwaye usenokuba uqhele ukuthanda iqabane lakho kakhulu kwaye uzityeshele iimfuno zakho.

Funda ukuthembela kwimo yakho kwaye uzikhumbuze ukuba kufanelekile ukuba wonwabe kwaye unokuzimela. Ukutshintsha kokuziphatha okukufake kubudlelwane obungenampilo kuthatha ixesha. Kodwa lixesha elichithwe kakuhle.

Nangona inokuba yinkqubo ebuhlungu, ukuzinika indawo oyifunayo ukuze ukhule kwaye ufumane ingcaciso ekugqibeleni kuya kukunceda ucele uthando olufunayo kwaye ufumane uthando obukade ululindile. Ufanele!