Umxholo
Ngaphandle kokuziqhelanisa, ukwazi ukuba yindoda kunye nentloko yekhaya kunokubonakala kungumsebenzi otyhafisayo. Nokuba abo batshatile iminyaka eliqela, ukukwazi ukukhokela kunye nokukhuthaza iqabane lakho kunye nosapho lwakho kunokuba nzima. Kweminye, utshintsho ukusuka ekubeni ungatshatanga uye ekubeni utshatile luza ngokwendalo kwaye alugudanga kwaphela. Kwabanye, nangona kunjalo, olu tshintsho lunokuba ngumceli mngeni. Xa ulungiselela umtshato okanye uzama ukubandakanyeka ngakumbi njengendoda, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ii-4's's: ingqalelo, ukwamkelwa, ukulungelelaniswa, kunye nothando.
1. Ingqalelo
Ukuhoya iqabane lakho kunokuba lutshintsho olunzima kakhulu kwindoda. Amadoda amaninzi achithe ubomi bawo abadala njengewanakho ukuzimela, ke ukwenza utshintsho ekunikeni ingqalelo kwiqabane lakho endaweni yezidingo zakho kunokuba ngumceli mngeni. Kodwa ukunikela ingqalelo kwiqabane lakho kuya kuwukhulisa ngakumbi umtshato wakho. Umlingane oziva exabisekile kwaye ethandwa kwaye ekho kuyo uya kuthi azibandakanye ngokupheleleyo kulwalamano kwaye abuyisele ingqalelo ebonisiweyo. Ngokukodwa kwabasetyhini, ukuba nolwazi kunye nokunyamekela iimfuno kunokuhamba ngendlela ende ekuphuculeni uxhulumaniso lweemvakalelo kunye nomzimba phakathi kwakhe kunye neqabane lakhe. Ukukhokela njengendoda kufuneka kubandakanya ukuqaphela kuba inika umzekelo ebantwaneni nakwabanye malunga nendlela ekufuneka liphathwe ngayo iqabane.
2. Ukwamkelwa
Ngelixa inokubandakanywa njengenxalenye yokumamela, ukunika iqabane lakho ukuvuma kubalulekile kwimpilo yobudlelwane bakho nakwindima yakho yobunkokeli. Cinga ngesuphavayiza esinefuthe elibukhali kwicandelo lakho lomsebenzi. Xa ujonga isitayile sobunkokeli salo mntu, ukwamkelwa kwezimvo kunye nokufezekiswa yenye into enokubakho njengamandla alo mntu. Kwangokunjalo, njengenkokeli emtshatweni wakho kubalulekile ukuba ubone izimvo, iingcinga kunye nezimvo zeqabane lakho njengexabisekileyo kubudlelwane. Anisayi kuhlala nivumelana okanye nibonana ngamehlo, kodwa inkokeli elungileyo izimisele ukubeka ecaleni ukungaboni ngasonye ukuze inike ukhuthazo kwabanye. Ngokwamkela iqabane lakho, ubonakalisa ukuba ilizwi lakho ayisiyiyo lodwa ukuba livakale kubudlelwane. Endaweni yoko, kungokusebenzisana apho kuya kuthi kuvele ezona zimvo zibalaseleyo.
3. Utshintsho
Yiba bhetyebhetye! Ingakumbi kubayeni abatsha, ukuba bhetyebhetye nemisebenzi yesiqhelo kunye yemihla ngemihla kunokuba nzima kakhulu. Ukuba ubuqhele ukwenza izinto ngandlela thile nakwinxalenye encinci yobomi bakho abadala, ukutshintsha loo nto kunokuba ngumsebenzi omkhulu. Qala ngezinto ezincinci, kwaye uhlala uvulekile ukutshintsha. Kumaqabane omabini, ukufunda ukuziqhelanisa nemikhwa yomnye kuthatha ixesha kwaye kufuna ukuqonda. Ubomi abuhlali buhamba ngokwesicwangciso, ke kubalulekile ukuba uhlale usenza ubhetyebhetye kunye nokuziqhelanisa. Ukuba nentumekelelo yokuba bhetyebhetye kwaye uvule utshintsho kunokunciphisa uxinzelelo kubudlelwane kwaye uvumele umtshato wakho uphumelele. Khokela ngomzekelo kwaye ukulungele ukuziqhelanisa notshintsho ebomini.
4. Ukuthandana
Okokugqibela kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo kungaphelelanga apho, kubalulekile ukubonisa uthando. Ngelixa oku kubandakanya uthando lomzimba kunye nokwabelana ngesondo, akuphelelanga apho! Uthando lunokubonakaliswa kwiqabane lakho ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Yiba nobuchule ekuboniseni iqabane lakho ukuba zithetha ntoni kuwe. Akukho ndlela okanye imigaqo emiselweyo emayilandelwe. Ukuthandana yinto oyenzayo! Elinye icebo eliluncedo kukujonga indlela iqabane lakho elibonisa ngayo wena uthando. UGary Chapman, kwincwadi yakhe Iilwimi ezi-5 zothando, Ichaza iindlela ezintlanu eziphambili abantu ababonisa ngazo uthando. Oku kubandakanya: ukunika izipho, ukuthetha amazwi okhuthazo okanye ukuvuma, ukuchukumisa ngokwasemzimbeni, ukwenza imisebenzi yenkonzo, kunye nokuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye. Ukuba ubeka ingqalelo eyoneleyo kwiqabane lakho kunye nendlela abakubonisa ngayo uthando, uya kuba nakho ukubona ukuba bathanda njani Yamkela uthando! Ukwazi iindlela eziphambili iqabane lakho linqwenela ukubonisa uthando kunye noxabiso lulwazi oluxabisekileyo. Awusoze uhambe kakubi ekuboniseni uthando ukuba uthatha ixesha lokwenza ngendlela enentsingiselo komnye umntu.
Khumbula ukuba njengomyeni uyinkokeli. Ukhokela ngomzekelo kwaye unokukhokelela ngokungafanelekanga okanye ngokutyebileyo. Kuxhomekeke kuwe ukuba ukhetha ukuba yindoda enjani. Ii-4 zika-A zinokuba sisixhobo esibalulekileyo, kodwa kukuwe ukuba utyale imali ngokupheleleyo kwaye uzibandakanye kubudlelwane bakho.