Amaxesha amaninzi sitshata nomntu oneempawu ezifanayo nezabazali bethu. Ngelixa ucinga ukuba le yeyona nto yokugqibela ufuna ukuyenza, iza ngesizathu esivakalayo kwaye esi sizathu sinokukunceda ukuba ukhule, kokubini emtshatweni wakho nakubo bonke ubudlelwane bakho.
Sifunda besebancinci iipatheni ezahlukeneyo kubazali bethu, emva koko sizenze kunye nabanye kubudlelwane bethu. Nokuba ipateni isempilweni okanye hayi, yile nto iba yinto eqhelekileyo kwaye intle. Unokuvela kusapho olungxola kakhulu, okanye mhlawumbi usapho lwakho lwarhoxiswa lwaza lwakude. Mhlawumbi abazali bakho bafuna okungaphezulu kunoko ubuya kukwenza kwaye mhlawumbi bebengakukhathalelanga okwenzileyo. Kulula kakhulu ukuba nomsindo kumlingane wethu ngokuphindaphinda ezi ndlela zokuziphatha, kodwa khumbula ukuba ukhethe iqabane lakho kwaye ngoku kungumsebenzi wakho ukutshintsha indlela osabela ngayo. Nje ukuba ufunde ukutshintsha indlela osabela ngayo, ezo ndlela zokuziphatha zivela kwiqabane lakho azikhathazi kangako okanye zihlala zinyamalala.
Sonke sinokukhetha iqabane elinamaphetheni afana nabazali bethu kuba oku kuqikelelwe kwaye kukhululekile
Ukuba utata wakho akakwazi ukuzithethela, ungatshata nomntu osokolayo ukuzithethela. Inqaku ngaphandle kokuyiqonda, sihlala sikhetha amaqabane kunye neepateni ezifanayo njengabazali bethu, nokuba sizithiyile ezo patheni.
Kodwa, kukho iindaba ezimnandi. Isizathu sokuba iimpendulo zakho zibekho kuwe kungenxa yokuba xa wawungumntwana wawungenakho ukukhetha kwaye ungenandlela yakulawula ngaphandle kokulandela umzekelo wabazali bakho. Njengabantwana, sinyanzelwa ukuba senze njengoko abazali bethu belindele, okanye siwela emgceni kuba kuphela kwento esiyaziyo. Xa ukhula, utshata umntu oneempawu ezifana nezakho njengabazali bakho kwaye usabela kubo ngendlela owawenza ngayo njengabantwana. Nje ukuba wazi ukuba ngoku umdala kwaye unokutshintsha indlela osabela ngayo, ungaqala uphendule ngendlela entsha. Ayizukuba lula kuba unokuba neminyaka engama-30 nangaphezulu uphendula ngendlela ethile. Ukuphendula ngendlela entsha akukho lula kodwa kufanelekile ngomsebenzi.
Umzekelo, ukuba umama wakho okanye utata wakho wayeqhele ukuhamba kwingxabano, ungafumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho linendlela efanayo, liphinda umbono wokuthintela. Ukuba utshintsha iphethini kwaye wazise iqabane lakho ngokubaluleka kokuhlala egumbini, okanye uqaphele ukuba uyangxola okanye ulile xa ehamba, eli lithuba lokujonga indlela osabela ngayo. Umama okanye utata wakho angadinga ukungqina ukuba banyanisile kwingxabano kwaye uzifumanise utshatile nomntu owenza okufanayo. Kuya kwenzeka ntoni xa uyeka ukukhuphisana kwaye usabele ngendlela entsha ngokupheleleyo? Mhlawumbi ungabona nje, okanye uthathele ingqalelo ungaphikisani okanye uthethe kuphela into oyaziyo. Ngaba ungonwaba emtshatweni wakho nakulo lonke ulwalamano lwakho? Sonke sifunde iipatheni zendlela esisabela ngayo kwiimeko ezahlukeneyo kwaye kuphela xa sinokuthi sithobe isantya kwaye sijonge iimpendulo zethu apho sinokuthi siqale ukucinga ngendlela entsha yokuphendula enokuthi itshintshe ikhosi yobudlelwane obunzima. Ke, ewe, sinokuziva singavumi ukutshata nomntu ofana nabazali bethu, kodwa nje ukuba sifunde indlela entsha yokuphendula siyakuqonda ukuba uninzi lwempikiswano ludibaniso lokuziphatha kunye nokusabela okufundwayo.
Ingcinga yokugqibela yokugcina engqondweni. Ukuba iqabane lakho liphinda-phinda iipateni ezinxunguphalisayo ezifanayo nabazali bakho, oku kuyakwenza ukuba usabele ngokukhawuleza kuwe kuba ubuphila kunye nokudakumba kokuziphatha ubomi bakho bonke. Ngelixa usebenza kwiindlela ezintsha zokuphendula kwiqabane lakho, khumbula ukuba unokuba ubeka ingqalelo enkulu kwezi patheni ziphindaphindayo. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba iqabane lakho likwanazo neepateni ezininzi ezithandekayo nezithandekayo ezifanele ukuthathelwa ingqalelo.
Ukuba ungayitshintsha indlela onokusabela ngayo kwiqabane lakho, ibiya kuba yintoni?