Umxholo
- Ukwenza ukuthandana kukhuseleke ngakumbi kulutsha
- 1. Imfundo yabakwishumi elivisayo
- 2. Ukuphikisa imbono yokuba uthando lokuqala luthando lwenene
- 3. Umahluko phakathi kothando lokwenene nokuthandana
- Ukunceda umntwana wakho okwishumi elivisayo aphumelele kwizigaba zokukopa
- Ukuthandana kwangoko akuyothusi
- Ubudlelwane bokuqala ebomini bunokuba luncedo
Uthando yimvakalelo edibanisa iminyaka eyahlukeneyo, ubuhlanga kunye nobuzwe. Sihlala sisiva ukuba "Uthando alwazi ubudala, ubude, ubunzima." Kodwa umbuzo ngulo "leliphi elona xesha lokuqalisa ukuthandana?"
Njengokuba sikhula kwaye iihomoni zibhabha kufuneka silindele ukuba sithandana, simsulwa kwaye alusoloko luthando lwenene. Izazinzulu zaseMelika ziqaphele ukuba amantombazana ahlala eqala ukuthandana eneminyaka eyi-12 kunye namakhwenkwe eneminyaka eyi-13. Olo manani lunokoyikisa uninzi lwabazali kodwa ndiyabacebisa ukuba behlise umoya kuba ayilohlobo lothando abalucingayo olu.
Ukwenza ukuthandana kukhuseleke ngakumbi kulutsha
Ke, makhe sihlalutye ukuba zeziphi ezona zinto zibalulekileyo zokwenza ukuba ukuthandana kuqala kolutsha okanye ngaphambi komntwana kukhuseleke.
1. Imfundo yabakwishumi elivisayo
Okokuqala, kuya kufuneka uqale ngokufunda ngesondo kwangoko (kwiminyaka eyi-8-9); Oko kuyakulungiselela umntwana wakho ubomi obuvuthiweyo kwaye njengoko esazi ukuba yintoni isini abayi kufuna ukuzama nje ukubona ukuba kwenzeka ntoni.
Imfundo yesondo iya kumsindisa umntwana wakho kwiingxaki ezinjengokukhulelwa okungafunekiyo kunye nokudana kuthando okanye ebantwini.
2. Ukuphikisa imbono yokuba uthando lokuqala luthando lwenene
Enye into ekufuneka uyifundisile umntwana wakho kukuba uthando lokuqala alusoloko lububomi bonke. Umntu oluthando lwakho lokuqala isenokungabi ngulo mntu utshata naye.
Ngenxa yobuninzi bolutsha, bacinga ukuba baya kutshata nomntu abathandana naye, kwaye xa olu thando "luphela" bacinga ukuba ubomi buphela. Leyo yingxaki kuba uninzi lolutsha luyazibulala xa "luphulukana" nothando.
3. Umahluko phakathi kothando lokwenene nokuthandana
Enye ingxaki xa umntu oneminyaka eli-12 ukuya kwengama-13 ubudala ethandana kukuba udibanisa uthando lokwenene nokuthandana. Ke kuya kufuneka ubacacisele ukuba luyintoni uthando lokwenene, ayisiyiyo le uyithethayo kodwa malunga nendlela oziva ngayo.
Ukunceda umntwana wakho okwishumi elivisayo aphumelele kwizigaba zokukopa
Enye ingxaki yobudlelwane bokuqala (kwaye kulo lonke ubudlelwane) kukukopa. Wonke umzali kufuneka athethe nomntwana wakhe malunga nokuba ukukopela kubuchaphazela njani ubudlelwane kunye nokwenzakala.
Ukukopa yeyona nto imbi kakhulu ikwenza uphoxeke kwaye ucinga ukuba bonke abantu bayafana. Woyike ukuthandana kwakhona ngenxa yokoyika ukuba umntu uyakuqhatha.
Kuya kufuneka uxoxe nomntwana wakho ngayo yonke into njengaxa kukho into engahambanga kakuhle angawabela yona hayi "nabahlobo bakhe bokwenyani", kuba uninzi lwabo alufani nonyana okanye intombi yakho.
Njengoko sikhula siqonda ukuba yintoni engqondweni yomntu, kodwa ulutsha alwenzi njalo.
Ukuthandana kwangoko akuyothusi
Akufuneki ulinde unyana okanye intombi yakho ukuba ilinde i-1 okanye i-2 iminyaka ukuya kumhla, baya kuqonda ukuba liliphi ixesha ngokwabo, indima yakho kukubachazela ukuba zinjani izinto. Kananjalo ungabuza abanye abazali ukuba ngaba abantwana babo benza okufanayo nokwakho.
Umntwana wakho unokujamelana nentlungu, enokuba buhlungu. Yiba nomonde kwaye usoloko umamele umntwana wakho kwaye ulawule imeko yakhe yeemvakalelo.
Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuzama ukungajongi umsantsa wesizukulwana. Zama ukuhlala uqonda ukuba umntwana wakho uziva kwaye uthini.
Ewe, kuya kufuneka uyilawule indlela aziphatha ngayo umntwana wakho, umzekelo xa eyedwa egumbini kunye "nomphefumlo" wakhe, indlela abathetha ngayo omnye komnye.
Ubudlelwane bokuqala ebomini bunokuba luncedo
Ubudlelwane bokuqala bunezibonelelo zabo, umzekelo, amava yintlalontle, unxibelelwano.
Ke eyona nto ibalulekileyo ekufuneka uyazi malunga nokuthandana kwangoko kukuba akukho budala bucetyiswayo. Umntu ngamnye ukhetha le minyaka. Ubuntu babantwana bohlukile kwaye oko kuthetha izimvo kunye nezenzo ezahlukeneyo.
Ndicinga ukuba zonke izinto ezenziwa lulutsha olunomdla ziqhelekile, abazali mabavumele abantwana ukuba bakhethe indlela echanekileyo, kunye nezikhokelo eziza kubakhusela kwintlungu nakwiingxaki. Soloko umamela oko abantwana bakho bakucingayo kwaye ungazami ukubasola ngezimvo zabo.
Konke okwenzekayo emntwaneni wakho kuhlala kwimemori yakhe njengesifundo, akusoloko kumnandi, kodwa kuhlala kusebenza kakuhle. Cinga ngawe kubudala obufanayo kwaye uzame ukuqonda ukuba kulutsha yonke into ijongeka ngathi bubomi obomeleleyo ngathi womelele ngokwaneleyo ukuba angamelana nobunzima. Nokuba akunjalo, sukubagweba abantwana bakho kwaye ubathande, luthando kuphela olunokusinceda siphumelele kuxinzelelo lobomi.
"Inye kuphela into eyonwabisayo ebomini bethu: ukuthanda nokuthandwa!"