Umxholo
- 1. Mamela ngothando
- 2. Musa ukuba kude kakhulu kwaye usebenze ngalo lonke ixesha
- 3. Ungaphoswa yiyo yonke imikhondo
- 4. Khetha ixesha lakho ngononophelo
- 5. Thetha ngokungqalileyo nangokulula
Unxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni yeyona nto iyimfuneko yokwakha nabuphi na ubudlelwane. Unxibelelwano lwenzeka ngalo lonke ixesha emtshatweni kwinqanaba elithile, nokuba kungamazwi okanye akungabi ngamagama.
Ubudlelwane buqala ngonxibelelwano, kwaye xa kukho ukuqhekeka konxibelelwano, umtshato ke wona usengxakini enkulu. Iyavakala ke into yokuzabalazela unxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni ukuba ufuna ukuba nolwalamano olusempilweni nolomeleleyo.
Ezi zinto zintlanu zilandelayo ezimele ukwenziwa nezingenziwayo ziya kubonisa ezinye zezinto ezibalulekileyo ekunxibelelaneni ngokufanelekileyo emtshatweni.
1. Mamela ngothando
Ukumamela sisiseko sonxibelelwano oluhle emtshatweni. Kunokuthiwa ukumamela kubonisa ukuba ulithanda kangakanani iqabane lakho.
Ukumamela ngothando kubandakanya ukuthathela ingqalelo xa umntu wakho ethandekayo ethetha, ngenjongo zokumazi ngcono, ukuqonda iimfuno zakhe, kunye nokufumanisa ukuba uziva njani kwaye ucinga ntoni malunga neemeko nobomi.
Ukwenza ujongano lwamehlo ngelixa uthetha kuthetha indlela ende yokunxibelelana nengqwalaselo yakho engahlulwanga, kunye nokuphendula ngovelwano nangokufanelekileyo, ngamazwi aqinisekisayo kunye nezenzo.
Ukuba uqhubeka uphazamisa xa iqabane lakho lithetha, ucinga ukuba uyazi ukuba ngethini, kungekudala uzakuvala naluphi na unxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni. Akuncedi nokulinda bade bayeke ukuthetha ukuze uthethe.
Ukutshintsha isifundo ngesiquphe kunika umyalezo ocacileyo wokuba awumameli, okanye awukhathali ngokwaneleyo ukuba ungaliva iqabane lakho ngaphandle kwawo nawuphi na umxholo ebebexakeke ngawo.
Ngokuqinisekileyo le yenye yezona zinto zibalulekileyo nezifanele ukwenziwa kunxibelelwano olusebenzayo.
2. Musa ukuba kude kakhulu kwaye usebenze ngalo lonke ixesha
Isakhono esisebenzayo sonxibelelwano oluhle emtshatweni kukufunda ukufikelela kwinqanaba elifanayo neqabane lakho kuyo nayiphi na incoko enikiweyo. Ngokusisiseko, kukho amanqanaba amabini: inqanaba lentloko kunye nenqanaba lentliziyo.
Kwinqanaba lentloko, iinyani, izimvo kunye neengcinga kuyaxoxwa ngazo, ngelixa kwinqanaba lentliziyo, konke malunga neemvakalelo kunye neemvakalelo, amava abuhlungu nawonwabisayo.
Unxibelelwano olugqwesileyo kunye nokuqonda kwenzeka xa omabini amaqela ebambana kunye kwaye banokuphendula ngokufanelekileyo kwinqanaba elifanayo.
Okuchasene kuyinyani xa umntu omnye enxibelelana kwinqanaba lentliziyo, umzekelo, kunye nezinye iimpendulo kwinqanaba lentloko. Khawufane ucinge ngale meko: umyeni ufika ekhaya afike inkosikazi yakhe ilele izisonge ebhedini amehlo ebomvu, ekhukhumele kwaye indlu iphithizela.
Uthi: “Kwenzeka ntoni, sithandwa?” Kwaye uthi, etsala iinyembezi, "Ndidiniwe kakhulu ..." Uphosa iingalo zakhe athi, "Ubusekhaya imini yonke; ingaba udiniwe yintoni, ubuncinci ubunokucoca amagumbi! ”
Kodwa, unxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni aluthethi ukuba le mpendulo. Ke, unxibelelana njani ngcono?
Impendulo efanelekileyo kwinqanaba 'lentliziyo' kunxibelelwano ngovelwano, ukuqonda, kunye nothando, ngelixa inqanaba 'lentloko' unxibelelwano lunokuphendulwa ngamazwi eengcebiso kunye nezisombululo ezinokubakho.
3. Ungaphoswa yiyo yonke imikhondo
Ukuyondelelana ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo sesinye sezona ndlela zisebenzayo zonxibelelwano emtshatweni. Oku kufuna ukuphendula kumazwi omnye nomnye ngendlela apho iqabane lakho liziva limenyiwe kwaye likhuthazekile ukuba labelane ngakumbi, kwaye kwinqanaba elinzulu.
Akufanele kubekho xinzelelo okanye ukunyanzeliswa ukuba kwabelwane. Ngamnye wethu unika imikhondo rhoqo malunga nezinto esihlangabezana nazo kwinqanaba lentliziyo.
Ezi zinokuba zizikhombisi ezingathethiyo ezinje ngolwimi lomzimba, iinyembezi, okanye ithoni kunye nevolumu yelizwi. Njengokuba umsi ubonakalisa umlilo, ezi zikhombisi zikhomba kwimicimbi ebalulekileyo okanye amava umntu anokunqwenela ukuthetha ngawo.
Ngokunika ingqalelo kwezi zikhokelo, unxibelelwano oluxabisekileyo lunokwenzeka ukuze wenzele kwaye womeleze umtshato wakho.
Kwimeko echazwe apha ngasentla, indoda elumkileyo ibinokuzibona iinyembezi zomfazi wayo kwaye iqonde ukuba inokuba kuninzi "ekudiniweyo" kwakhe. Emva kokumenzela ikomityi yeti, ebehlala phantsi ebhedini ecaleni kwakhe athi, “Ndixelele ukuba uziva njani kwaye yintoni ekukhathazayo.”
Ungazikhathaleli ezi zinto zenziwayo kunye nezingenziwayo kwizakhono zonxibelelwano kuba yenye yezona zinto zibalulekileyo kunxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni.
4. Khetha ixesha lakho ngononophelo
Akusoloko kunokwenzeka ukuba ukhethe ixesha elifanelekileyo lokunxibelelana kubudlelwane, nako, kwiimeko zoxinzelelo xa izinto zihamba ngesiquphe.
Kodwa ngokubanzi, kungcono ukulinda ithuba xa kukho iziphazamiso ezimbalwa zokuthetha ngemicimbi ebalulekileyo. Xa omnye okanye nobabini nicaphuke kakhulu kwaye nidandathekile, akusoloko kulixesha elifanelekileyo ukuzama ukunxibelelana.
Lindani ithutyana de nibe nipholile kancinci, emva koko hlalani phantsi kunye kwaye nabelane ngeengcinga kunye neemvakalelo zakho omnye komnye nide nivumelane ngendlela eya phambili.
Ukuba unombandela obalulekileyo oza kuxoxa ngawo, ixesha lesidlo phambi kwabantwana mhlawumbi ayilolona khetho lufanelekileyo. Nje ukuba usapho luhlale ubusuku bonke, emva koko wena neqabane lakho ninokuba nedwa nedwa kwezo ntetho.
Ukuba omnye wenu ngumntu "wasekuseni" kwaye omnye akakho, oku kufuneka kuthathelwe ingqalelo, hayi ukuzisa imiba enzima ebusuku kakhulu xa ilixesha lokulala, kwaye kufuneka ulale.
Obu bubuncinci bokunxibelelana ngomtshato okanye naluphi na unxibelelwano lobudlelane olunokunceda ekuphuculeni izakhono zonxibelelwano ngokubalulekileyo, eziya kuthi zikhokelele kubudlelwane obonwabisayo nobusempilweni.
5. Thetha ngokungqalileyo nangokulula
Ukuzixakekisa kakhulu malunga nendlela yokunxibelelana ngokufanelekileyo kubudlelwane endaweni yoko kunokusebenza ngokuchasene neenjongo zakho ezintle kunye nokuwohloka kwezakhono zonxibelelwano ezikhoyo
Ngamanye amaxesha sinokuba novakalelo kwaye sisoyika ukukhubekisa amaqabane ethu de sigqibe ukuthetha kwizangqa.
Eyona ndlela ilungileyo kukuthetha ukuba uthetha ukuthini kwaye uthetha ukuthini. Kubudlelwane obukhuselekileyo nobusempilweni, apho omabini amaqabane esazi ukuba bayathandwa kwaye bayamkelwa, nokuba kukho ukungaqondani, uyazi ukuba bebengenanjongo okanye ububi.
Indoda esisilumko yakha yathi kwiqabane layo: “Ukuba ndithetha into enokuba neentsingiselo ezimbini, yazi ukuba bendithetha eyona ibhetele.” Lo ngowona mzekelo ubalaseleyo wezakhono zonxibelelwano ezisempilweni kwizibini ezitshatileyo.
Enye yeendlela zokunxibelelana ezibalulekileyo kwizibini ezitshatileyo zomtshato ohlala ixesha elide kukuziqhelanisa nokungalindeli ukuba iqabane lakho lifunde ingqondo yakho, emva koko ucaphukiswe xa engalunganga.
Ke, ukuthatha into yonxibelelwano olusebenzayo emtshatweni kukuba kungcono kakhulu ukuchaza iimfuno zakho ngokulula nangokucacileyo- impendulo ngu-ewe okanye hayi. Emva koko wonke umntu uyazi apho emi khona kwaye angaqhubeka ngokufanelekileyo.
Bukela le vidiyo: