Amaphupha Ngokukopela: Bathetha Ntoni kunye nezinto ekufuneka bezenzile

Umbhali: John Stephens
Umhla Wokudalwa: 2 Eyomqungu 2021
Hlaziya Umhla: 1 Eyekhala 2024
Anonim
Amaphupha Ngokukopela: Bathetha Ntoni kunye nezinto ekufuneka bezenzile - I-Psychology
Amaphupha Ngokukopela: Bathetha Ntoni kunye nezinto ekufuneka bezenzile - I-Psychology

Umxholo

Ukujonga iqabane lakho kwiso kunye nokuzibiza uthando kubo ngentsasa emva kobusuku obugcwele amaphupha amdaka kunokuba nzima.Kwelinye, kuya kufuneka ujongane nelo lizwi liphazamisayo engqondweni yakho elihlala likukhumbuza ngamaphupha akho kubusuku obudlulileyo.

Oku kunokukwenza ukuba uqale ukubuza ukunyaniseka kwakho kuba amaphupha malunga nokukopela axinzeleleka kumanqanaba amaninzi.

Nangona kunokuba nzima ukukwamkela, ukuba namaphupha ngokukhohlisa iqabane lakho akukwenzi ube ngumntu ombi. Unokumangaliswa kukufumanisa ukuba kuyinto exhaphake kakhulu, njengoko uphando olwenziwe ngo-2018 luveze ukuba phantse ama-60% abasetyhini babenephupha elithile malunga nokukopa kumaqabane abo.

Ke, chwayita sele. Awuwedwa kule nto.

Nangona kunjalo, nantsi apho inika umdla.


Nangona amaphupha ngokukopela enokubangela ukuba uqale ukuzibuza wena okanye iqabane lakho, enye yeendlela ezinokukunceda uhlala ujonga izinto kumbono opheleleyo. Ewe, ukuqonda kwakho kunokuba uzama ukukuxelela into, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha, unokufuna nje indlela eyahlukileyo.

Ukuthatha imizuzu embalwa ukuhlalutya la maphupha okungathembeki kunokutyhila izinto ezininzi malunga nolwalamano lwakho nawe kwaye uncede ubeke ingqondo yakho ngokukhululeka.

Ngaba unamaphupha okungathembeki? Eli nqaku liza kukuxelela into ekufuneka uyenze nabo.

Athetha ntoni amaphupha ngokukopa?

Okokuqala, amaphupha aluthotho lweziqendu ezenzeka ngexesha lokulala. Ngokwesiqhelo, zibonakala ziyinyani ngexesha kodwa zilityelwe kakhulu kwimizuzu embalwa emva kokuba uvukile. Amaphupha yile mifanekiso, iingcinga, okanye iimvakalelo ohlangabezana nazo ngelixa ulele.

Nangona kukho lonke utyekelo lokuzikhupha njengezingafunekiyo, amaphupha akho anokusebenza njengeyona ndlela iphambili kwi-subconscious yakho yokunxibelelana nengqondo yakho eyaziyo.


Amaphupha malunga nokukopela enzekile xa ephupheni, umntu ethandana nomntu ongenguye iqabane lakhe. Inokuhamba macala omabini; umntu nokuba unephupha apho akhohlisa iqabane lakhe okanye ubona iqabane lakhe libaqhatha ephupheni.

Ngayiphi na imeko, amaphupha malunga nokukopela kunokuthetha izinto ezininzi, kwaye ukuphindaphinda ukuba namaphupha kufuna ukuba kujongwe kufutshane nasekupheleni kwakho.

Zama kwakhona:Ukungathembeki kwimibuzo; Ngaba iqabane lakho liyakopela?

Kutheni le nto umntu enamaphupha ngokukopa?

Nangona uninzi lwempikiswano lujikeleze umxholo, ukuba namaphupha okukopela kuhlala kushiya umbuzo engqondweni yakho; umbuzo othi 'kutheni.'

Kutheni la maphupha eyenzeka nje? Ngaba zikho izizathu ezithile onokuthi uzibone wena okanye iqabane lakho likopela ephupheni?

Le mibuzo inokukuzingela ixesha elide, kwaye ukuba awufumani mpendulo kwangoko, la maphupha angatyala imbewu yokuthandabuza engqondweni yakho kwaye inokudala ulwalamano lwakho nomonakalo omkhulu.


Nazi izizathu ezimbalwa zokuba unokuba unamaphupha ngokukopa.

1. Isenokuba luphawu lweparanoia yakho

Nangona incoko isaqhubeka, iingcali zengqondo, abahlalutyi bamaphupha, kunye nezinye izazinzulu zibonisa ukuba amaphupha ziingcinga ezizimeleyo ezijolise kwimisebenzi yakho yakutshanje, iincoko, okanye iimeko okhe wakwenza ngaphambili.

Ngokwenjenjalo, kukhuselekile ukutsho ukuba amaphupha akho ngamanye amaxesha angabonisa ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni ebomini bakho nasengqondweni yakho. Ukuhamba ngale nto, amaphupha akho malunga neqabane lokukhohlisa kunokuba sisiphumo separanoia yakho.

Ukuba usebudlelwaneni nomntu owenza ukuba uthandabuze iinjongo zabo kuwe, unokuchitha ixesha elifanelekileyo ukhathazeka ukuba boyisile ngokwesondo ngaphandle kobudlelwane. Ezi ngcinga zinokufumana indlela yazo emaphupheni akho kwaye ziqale ukubonisa imifanekiso kuwe ngelixa ulele.

Oku kuthetha ukuba nangona akusoloko kunjalo, amaphupha akho malunga nokukhohlisa iqabane lakho kunokuba sisiphumo somceli mngeni onokuthi ujongane nawo.

Ikwathetha ukuba ayililo lonke iphupha lokukhohlisa onalo elithetha ukuba iqabane lakho lenza isenzo esimdaka ngasemva kwakho.

2. Uziva ungazithembanga malunga nolwalamano

Oku kukhutshwa kwinqanaba lokugqibela. Ukuba ulwalamano apho uziva ungakhuselekanga; malunga nokuba uthetha ntoni kwiqabane lakho, indlela abazimisele ngayo ekwenzeni ubudlelwane busebenze, nangayo nayiphi na enye into, unokuzibona unamaphupha ngokukopela iqabane lakho.

Ukongeza, ukungazithembi okuza nokuzithemba okuphantsi kunokubangela ukuba ube namaphupha ngokukopa. Xa uzibona wena okanye iqabane lakho likopela ephupheni, inye into ekufuneka uyenzile kukuzivavanya ngononophelo kwaye uqinisekise ukuba loo maphupha ayiziziphumo zokuzithemba okuphantsi.

3. Unamava angaphambili okungathembeki

Ukuba ukhe wanamava okwehla kokungathembeki (mhlawumbi wakhohlisa iqabane ngaphambi okanye iqabane lakho lenze oko kuwe), iinkumbulo ezivela kwixesha elidlulileyo zinokuqala ukuzibonakalisa njengamaphupha, ngakumbi xa umbono wokungoneli okanye ukungoneliseki kuqala ukuseta.

Ukuba ubukhe wanomlingane okhohlise kuwe kwixa elidlulileyo, eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokuqinisekisa ukuba umjikelo awuziphindi ngokwawo kukunyaniseka kwiqabane lakho langoku. Ncokola nabo kwaye ubazise malunga nokuqhubeka engqondweni yakho.

Yigcine engqondweni into yokuba unendima ekufuneka uyidlalile ukuba olo loyiko lunokupheliswa ngonaphakade engqondweni yakho.

Athetha ntoni amaphupha ngokukopa?

Ngoku ukuba sivavanye ngokukhawuleza ukuba kuthetha ukuthini 'ukuphupha ngokukhohlisa' kwaye sijonge izizathu ezinokubangela la mava makhe sijonge ngokukhawuleza ukuba la maphupha athetha ntoni.

Singakuvavanya oku ngeendlela ezimbini; athini amaphupha ngokukopela kwiqabane lakho kwaye ngawaphi amaphupha malunga nokukhohlisa iqabane lakho onokuthetha lona.

  • Ithetha ukuthini xa uphupha malunga nokukopela kweqabane lakho?

Ukuba namaphupha okuqhathwa ngumlingane / iqabane lakho kunokuthetha izinto ezininzi. Ezinye zezi ziquka:

1. Imvakalelo yokuqhathwa ngokuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye neqabane lakho

Ukuba ukhe walibona iqabane lakho likhohlisa umntu ongamaziyo ephupheni, inokuba yindlela yengqondo yakho yokukuxelela ukuba uziva ukhohlisiwe kulwalamano. Mhlawumbi, iqabane lakho liqala ukuchitha ixesha elininzi nabanye abantu kunokuchitha nawe.

Oku kunokuba lixesha lokuchitha emsebenzini, nabahlobo okanye usapho, okanye nakwi-intanethi.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Vavanya imeko yobudlelwane bakho kwaye ube nengxoxo evulekileyo malunga nayo.

Ngaba ucinga ukuba iqabane lakho linika ingqalelo kwinto engeyiyo? Unxibelelwano sisixhobo esiphambili esinokukunceda uhambe ngala maxesha alinga kubudlelwane bakho.

2. Uziva ungonelisekanga ngenxa yokuba ukholelwa ukuba iqabane lakho langaphambili linento ongenayo

Ukuba unephupha apho iqabane lakho likhohlisa kunye ne-ex yabo, kunokuba njalo ngaphakathi ngaphakathi, uziva ungonelanga ngenxa yokwazi ukuba umntu wabo wakudala unento ongayenziyo.

Amaphupha ngokukhohlisa nge-ex kunokubangelwa yinto ebaluleke njengeyona nto i-ex yayiluthando lokuqala lweqabane lakho, okanye isenokuba sisimbo sabo kunye nokuqhutywa kwengqondo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Ukuthatha ixesha lokuba nentliziyo-neentliziyo kunye neqabane lakho kunokuqinisa ukuthembela kwakho kubo. Fumana iindlela zobuchule zokuzikhumbuza ukuba kutheni iqabane lakho likukhethile kunye nezinto ezizithandayo ngawe. Ukuba awuqinisekanga malunga noku, nceda ubabuze.

Ukuziqhelanisa nokuzithanda kunye nokusetyenziswa kweemantras ezintle kunokukunceda woyise ezi mvakalelo zokungoneliseki.

3. Ufuna ukuba iqabane lakho livane nomntu omaziyo

Oku kunokuba njalo xa uphupha iqabane lakho ukukopela nomntu omaziyo. Eli phupha lityhila ukuba ufuna iqabane lakho liqale ukuvana naloo mntu kwindawo ethile ezantsi.

Oku kuhlala kunjalo ukuba umntu ephupheni lakho ngumntu omthandayo, umhlobo osenyongweni, okanye ilungu losapho.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Kwakhona, unxibelelwano lubalulekile. Thetha neqabane lakho ubavumele baqonde ukuba ubaluleke kangakanani loo mntu kuwe.

4. Ingcinga yakho inokuba ibaleka nje

Ayingawo onke amaphupha malunga neqabane lokukhohlisa elithetha ukuba iqabane lakho lenza into eyintlanzi ngasemva kwakho. Oku kuhlala kunjalo ukuba iphupha libonisa iqabane lakho nomntu ongahleliyo.

Kwakhona, amava adlulileyo okungathembeki anokufaka isandla koku.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Xa kunje, ukubonana nengcali kunokuba linyathelo elifanelekileyo lokuthatha. Ingcali inokukunceda ukuba uhlele amava akho adlulileyo kwaye ufumane inkxaso efunekayo ukuze uqhubeke.

5. Uziva ungcatshiwe kwezinye iinkalo zobomi bakho

Xa iqabane olithandayo likukopela, iimvakalelo zomsindo, ukungcatsha, kunye nokungathembeki kufuneka kuvele. Ngelixa oku kusenzeka kubomi bokwenyani, amaphupha malunga neqabane elikhohlisayo linokubangela iimvakalelo ezinjalo.

Xa oku kusenzeka, kubalulekile ukuba uzihlolisise kwaye ubone ukuba ngaba ikhona indawo ebomini bakho apho uziva ungcatshiwe okanye unomsindo. Ngelixa la maphupha enokudlala ngeendlela ezingaqhelekanga, zinokucebisa ngeemeko ezinkulu ngakumbi kunephupha nje onalo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Iiseshoni zokwazisa ziya kudlala indima enkulu ekuncedeni ukuba uchaze kakuhle ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni engqondweni yakho kwaye zikuncede uyile iqhinga lokuloyisa le mingeni.

6. Ubudlelwane bakho budinga i-TLC

Ngelixa kunokuba nzima ukuyamkela le nto, amaphupha malunga nokukhohlisa iqabane / iqabane linokubonisa ukuba ubudlelwane bakho budinga umsebenzi othile. Isenokuthetha ukuba sele uqalisile ukukhukuliseka umke kuwe okanye kukho into efuna ukuhoywa.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Unxibelelwano luya kuba yibhulorho phakathi kwendala kunye neyintsha ngokobudlelwane bakho. Brainstorm neqabane lakho nize neendlela ezintsha nezinomdla zokunonga ubuhlobo benu.

7. Ulwa nemvakalelo yelahleko, okanye uziva ngathi kukho into ephosakeleyo ebomini bakho

Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho liyakhohlisa ephupheni, kunokubonisa ukuba kukho into okholelwa ukuba ilahlekile ebomini bakho. Le inokuba yinto onokuyibonisa ngokukhawuleza okanye into engaphathekiyo ngakumbi.

Ezingabonakaliyo zinokuba luthando kunye nokuqwalaselwa liqabane lakho okanye ixesha labo kunye nokhathalelo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Ukuphuma kunye nawe kuya kwenza itoni elungileyo. Njengoko ulungiselela oku, hamba nejenali kwaye ucinge nzulu ngobomi bakho bangaphambili nobangoku. Ngaba ikhona into obungathanda ukuba nayo (ngakumbi neqabane lakho) ongenayo?

Ukuba ewe, unokufumana inzuzo kwincoko esuk 'entliziyweni neliqabane.

8. Iminqweno yakho yesondo inokuba iza kudlala

Ukuba ukhe wathetha neqabane lakho malunga nokuzama ikhinki yokwabelana ngesondo kwaye benqaba ukwehla ngaloo ndlela nawe, unokuba nephupha elothusayo apho bazibandakanya khona kuloo fantasy yesini nomnye umntu.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Ukuzama ukucinezela iminqweno yakho yesini (ngakumbi ukuba ayilimoshi iqabane lakho) kunokuba lilize. Ngenxa yoko, unokufuna ukuphinda uncokole kwakhona kwaye ubone ukuba ungafikelela njani kwisivumelwano.

9. Ukoyika into engaziwayo

Esi sesinye sezizathu eziphambili zokuba ungazifumana unala maphupha xa yonke into kubudlelwane bakho ihamba kakuhle.

Xa iqabane lakho linemifanekiso egqibeleleyo, likuhambela ngendlela ofuna ngayo, kwaye lide likwanelise ngokwasemphefumlweni nangokwesondo, usenokuba namaphupha amaqabane akhohlisayo.

Kungenxa yokuba wenziwe wathanda kwaye ubambelele kuyo nantoni na ekwenza wonwabe. Xa ekugqibeleni kuza indlela yakho, uloyiko lokuphulukana nayo kunokubangela ukuba imifanekiso iqale ukubaleka engqondweni yakho (kokubini ukuqonda nokungazi).

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Ziqinisekise ngesikhundla sakho kubudlelwane.

Zikhumbuze rhoqo ukuba iqabane lakho lithetha lukhulu kuwe kwaye uthetha lukhulu nakubo. Kangangoko kunokwenzeka, zama ukuchitha ixesha elinomgangatho kunye neqabane lakho ngokunjalo.

10. Iqabane lakho liyakukhohlisa

Ukuya kuthi ga kule convo, le yeyona nyaniso inzima kuzo zonke. Ukuphupha iqabane lakho likukopela kunokuba yindlela yakho engacacanga yokukuxelela ukuba kukho into engalunganga kubudlelwane; iqabane lakho liyakopa.

Ngelixa le nto isenokungasoloko injalo, xa unamaphupha ngokuhamba kwexesha, kwaye benqabile ukuhamba, ungafuna ukuthatha inyathelo umva kwaye uzibuze umbuzo onzima; "Ngaba iqabane lam liyandikhohlisa?"

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Xa la maphupha engenakuphela, vulela iqabane lakho malunga nawo. Ukuba akukho nto yokwesaba, abayi kukhusela kwaye kufuneka bakwazi ukukunceda ukunciphisa ukwesaba kwakho.

Ukongeza, uhlalutye ngokunzulu ubudlelwane kwaye uchaze izinto ezinokubangela urhano kuwe.

Ngaba uyafuna ukwazi ngakumbi malunga nokuba kuthetha ntoni ukukopela amaphupha? Bukela le vidiyo.

  • Kuthetha ukuthini xa ukhohlisa iqabane lakho ephupheni?

Amaphupha apho ufumanisa ukuba ukopela iqabane, anokungonwabi njengamaphupha apho ubona iqabane likukopela (ukuba akunjalo).

Kungenxa yokuba la maphupha ahlala eshiya uninzi loxanduva emagxeni akho, kwaye kuya kufuneka ujongane neminye imiba esembindini ukuba ubudlelwane bakho buya kuqhubeka bungekho monakalo.

Nanga amaphupha ngokukhohlisa iqabane lakho linokuthetha ntoni.

1. Kukho into onentloni ngayo (kunye nokuzifihla kwiqabane lakho) ebomini bokwenyani

Amaxesha amaninzi, imiyalezo emaphupheni akho iza njengezafobe. Oku kuthetha ukuba nangona kungenakuba bubulumko ukuyithatha le miyalezo ngendlela eza ngayo, ukungayihoyi kwaphela isenokungabi sisigqibo esihle.

Iphupha apho ukopela iqabane linokuthetha ukuba kukho into ozama ukuyigcina kubo ebomini bokwenyani.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Kuya kufuneka unyaniseke ngokupheleleyo kuwe. Ngaba ikho into ebaluleke kakhulu kwixesha lakho elidlulileyo ukuba wenza konke okusemandleni akho ukufihla kwiqabane lakho?

Ukuba ewe, i-subconscious yakho inokuzama ukukwazisa ukuba lixesha lokuba uyikhuphe kunye neqabane lakho.

2. Uziva unetyala ngento ethile

Kuyafana noko kuxoxwa kwinqaku lokuqala, amaphupha, apho ukopelayo, unokucebisa ukuba kukho into eyehlileyo ebomini bakho oziva unetyala ngayo.

Kukho konke ukunyaniseka, ayifanelanga ukuba ibe malunga nobomi bakho bokuthandana okanye ubudlelwane; inokuba malunga nento engadibananga kwaphela.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Uya kuxhamla kakhulu kwiiseshoni zokuchazwa kwangaphambili.

Xa uchonge nantoni na oziva unetyala ngayo, thatha ixesha lokufumanisa iimvakalelo zakho kwaye ulahle elo tyala. Ukuba ucinga kunyanzelekile, nceda undwendwele ingcali (ingcali) yokukunceda.

3. Unika ixesha elininzi kakhulu nengqwalaselo kwenye into / komnye umntu

Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba ukopela iqabane lakho ephupheni, inokucebisa ukuba kukho into phaya ngaphandle ethathe ingqalelo yakho mva nje.

Isenokuba ngumsebenzi wakho, usapho lwakho, kunye nehlabathi kwi-intanethi.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Thatha ixesha ukubala iindleko kwaye uthathe isigqibo sokuba ngubani na oxabiseke ngakumbi kuwe. Iqabane lakho? Ukuba kunjalo, ngokuqonda qala ukwenza ixesha oza kuchitha nabo.

Vimba ixesha kwishedyuli yakho, lichithe nabo, wonwabe, unxibelelane, kwaye wenze izinto ezikwenza wonwabe. Oku kuyakunceda nokucoca ulwalamano.

4. Iqabane lakho liziva lingakhuselekanga kubudlelwane

Ukuba ukhohlisile iqabane lakho ephupheni, oko kunokuthetha ukuba iqabane lakho liziva lingonelanga okanye lingazithembanga kubudlelwane bakho.

Oku kunokuba sisiphumo sezinto ezibonakalayo (izinto ezizizo zonke iintloko zazo) okanye ngenxa yezinto ozenze zaziva.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Yenza uxanduva lokubonisa iqabane lakho (kokubini ngamazwi nangezenzo) ukuba zibaluleke kangakanani kuwe. Ukufezekisa oku ngokukuko, kufuneka ulwazi ulwimi lothando lweqabane lakho kwaye uzame konke okusemandleni akho ukuluthetha.

5. Inxalenye yakho ikhangela ulonwabo olongezelelekileyo

Ukuba ukhe waphupha ukuba iqabane lakho lihamba nawe kunye nabahlobo bakho ngomhla ophindwe kabini (kunye nezinto ezingalawulekiyo ukusuka apho), oko kunokuthetha ukuba kunzulu, uziva ngathi kukho into ephazamise ubudlelwane bakho.

Ngapha koko, ukuba ukhe waphupha ngawe kwi-orgy, inokuba umzimba wakho ufuna ulonwabo oluza nokuzama into enomdla.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Nokuba kunzima oku njengoko kubonakala ngathi, eli ayilixesha lokuqala ukuba neentloni ngawe okanye ukuzama ukucinezela iimvakalelo zakho. Ukuba unobomi obusebenzayo ngokwesondo kunye neqabane lakho, unokufuna ukuthetha ngesihloko kwaye ubazise ukuba uvulekile ukuzama izinto ezintsha.

Jonga iindlela onokuthi ufikelele kuzo ukuze ulwalamano lwakho lungabethwa ekuhambeni kwexesha.

6. Ufuna ukusondela emntwini iqabane lakho lisondele kuye

Ukuba nephupha apho ukopela iqabane lakho nomntu abasondele kuye kunokuba ngumqondiso wokuba ezantsi, ufuna ukusondela kumntu othetha lukhulu kubo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Vavanya ubudlelwane beqabane lakho nalo mntu kwaye wazi ukuba ukusondela kuloo mntu kungalivuyisa iqabane lakho okanye akunjalo. Ukuba loo mntu ungumhlobo osondeleyo / ulwalamano lweqabane lakho, ukusondela kubo kunokuba ngumbono olungileyo.

7. Uziva utsalelekile komnye umntu

Ukuba uphuphe apho ukopela nomntu onomdla kuye kubomi bokwenyani, isenokuba ngumnxeba osuka kwi-subconscious yakho ukuba unyathele ngononophelo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Ukuthetha ngokunyanisekileyo nawe kunokukunceda uhambe kule ndawo ithambekeleyo. Zibuze eminye imibuzo enzima; yintoni ngalomntu okutsalayo?

Ngaba banayo into iqabane lakho elingenayo (umsebenzi ohlawula ngcono)? Ukuba ewe, unokufuna ukunyaniseka malunga noku neqabane lakho.

Kananjalo unokufuna ukubona ingcali enokukunceda uvule iimvakalelo zakho kwaye inike iingcebiso ngeengcali ngendlela yokwenza ngalo maxesha ngaphandle kokwenza ulwalamano lwakho lusokole.

8. Kukho ezinye zeempawu onqwenela ukuba iqabane lakho zibe nazo zibe zingenazo

Ukuba iphupha limalunga nokukopela nomntu onobudlelwane obuzinzileyo kwaye ongatshatanga naye emzimbeni, oko kunokuthetha ukuba kukho iimpawu abanazo onqwenela ukuba iqabane lakho libe nazo.

Isenokuba yingqondo yabo yesimbo, ifashoni, okanye uburharha. Isenokuba sisichaso sabo okanye umtsalane.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Nxibelelana neqabane lakho kwaye niphuhlise iindlela zokuyila zokubanceda babe ngabona bantu bafuna kubo. Khumbula, nangona kunjalo, ukuba iqabane lakho alizukuba yiyo yonke into ofuna ukuba yiyo.

Yiyo loo nto ukulalanisa kubalulekile.

9. Usenokungaphikisi ngokupheleleyo kwimbono yokuba nobudlelwane obuvulekileyo

Oku ikakhulu kunjalo ukuba uphuphe malunga nokutshintsha kweqabane kunye nesinye isibini osaziyo. Ukuba kunjalo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ufuna ukuzama ezinye izinto ngaphandle kweqabane elinye.

Kwakhona jonga ngokwembono ebanzi. Kungenzeka ukuba esi sibini sinento ongenayo neqabane lakho? Ewe? Leyo ingayimpendulo oyifunayo.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Kwakhona, nxibelelana neqabane lakho.

Ukuba uziva ngathi intlantsi kulwalamano lwakho iyafa, cwangcisa into emnandi nenomdla kunye neqabane lakho- njengokubaleka okanye iholide kwindawo entle. Ukuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye kunokukunceda ukuba ufumane kwakhona kwakhona.

10. Ngaba inokuba sisilumkiso?

Ukuba unephupha lokukhohlisa xa usecicini lokuthatha isigqibo esikhulu ngobomi bakho kunye neqabane lakho (njengokutshata nabo okanye ukuhamba ilizwe lonke), unokufuna ukugxila ngakumbi kwiimvakalelo onazo phupha.

Ngaba yayiyimincili, uloyiko, okanye uloyiko? Kungenzeka ukuba i-subconscious yakho izama ukudlulisa umyalezo wokomfuziselo kuwe.

Kwenziwe ntoni:

Gxila ngakumbi kwiimvakalelo ozive ephupheni. Ijenali inokukunceda uhlele kwezi mvakalelo kwaye uqonde kanye ukuba kwenzeka ntoni nzulu.

Ukuba uziva usoyika okanye usoyika, unokufuna ukubeka iinyawo zakho kwiibhuleki kwaye uhlalutye ngononophelo eso sigqibo uza kusithatha neqabane lakho. Cinga ngeempembelelo zexesha elide zeso sigqibo.

Ngaba ucinga ukuba zingathandeka?

Kwakhona, ukuba nombono wesithathu (kumntu omthembileyo nonomhloniphayo) kunokuba yintsikelelo kuba banokukunceda ubone izinto ngokwembono entsha.

Ngaba ngumbono omuhle ukuthetha neqabane lakho ngala maphupha?

Akukho lizwi linye ukuphendula koku. Ngamanye amaxesha, kuya kuba kuhle ukubaxelela, kwaye ngamanye amaxesha, ungade ufune ukubaxelela ngayo.

Nangona kunjalo, ngaphambi kokuba wenze isigqibo sokuba ubaxelele okanye ungabaxeleli, Nazi izinto ezimbalwa omele uziqwalasele.

  1. Cinga ngomyalezo iphupha elizama ukugqitha kuwe. Sivavanye malunga neemeko ezingama-20 ezahlukeneyo apho unokuba namaphupha okungathembeki kwaye nganye yazo ithetha ntoni. Ngaba umyalezo ephupheni wenzelwe wena (into ekufuneka usebenzele kuyo)?

Ewe? Unokufuna ukugxila ekuhleleni iimvakalelo zakho kuqala. Ukuba kuya kufuneka uthethe neqabane lakho malunga noku, unokucinga ukushiya indawo apho ubaxelela khona ukuba uphuphe ngokukhohlisa.

  1. Ngaba iqabane lakho likwenzile okuthile ukukrokrela?

Unokufuna ukucinga ngokuthetha nabo malunga nezenzo zabo ezikwenza ukuba uqaphele ngelixa ushiya 'amaphupha okungathembeki'.

  1. Cinga ukuthetha neqabane lakho malunga namaphupha ukuba aphindaphindiwe kwaye uyakholelwa ukuba iqabane lakho kufuneka lazi ngawo. Ukungathembeki (nokuba kuyinyani okanye kuyabonwa) sisifundo esibuhlungu, ke unokufuna ukucinga ngononophelo malunga noku ngaphambi kokuvumela iqabane lakho lingene kula maphupha okukopela.

Umgca wezantsi

Ukuba namaphupha okuqhathwa kunokuba yinto eninzi ukusongela intloko yakho. Nangona kunjalo, eli nqaku libonakalisile ukuba ayisiyiyo yonke into malunga namaphupha kodwa imiyalezo ekula maphupha. Nika ingqwalaselo kufutshane noko ingqondo yakho izama ukunxibelelana nawe kunamaphupha okhe wawaphupha.

Khumbula, ayingawo onke amaphupha okungathembeki athetha ukuba wena okanye iqabane lakho ngabantu ababi.

Isenokuba yingqondo yakho uzama ukwenza inombolo kuwe.