Umxholo
- 1. Ukuba ufuna ukuthetha ngesihloko "esikhulu", cwangcisa ixesha lokwenza oko
- 2. Qala ngamabinzana afudumeleyo
- 3. Yitsho into oyifunayo, kwaye uqhubeke nesihloko
- 4. Bonisa indoda yakho ukuba uyivile into ayithethileyo
- 5. Ukusombulula ingxabano: Yilwa ngokungenamkhethe
- 6. Sukumenza aqikelele ukuba ziyintoni na iimfuno zakho
- 7. Chaza iimfuno zakho ngokuthe ngqo nangolwimi olucacileyo
- 8. Amadoda enza ngcono xa uwavuza ngemisebenzi yawo elungileyo
Ngaba ukhe uzibuze ukuba, xa uthetha nomyeni wakho, akathethi ulwimi lwakho? Ukuba ujongeka edidekile xa uthetha, uqinisekile ukuba akaliva nelinye igama olithethayo?
Kukho uluhlu olupheleleyo lweencwadi ezibhaliweyo malunga neendlela ezahlukeneyo zokunxibelelana kwamadoda nabasetyhini. Ngaba ujonga iingcebiso ngendlela onxibelelana ngayo nomyeni wakho?
Nazi ezinye iingcebiso eziza kukunceda uphule "isithintelo kulwimi lwesini" kwaye ugcine incoko ihamba phakathi kwakho nomyeni wakho.
1. Ukuba ufuna ukuthetha ngesihloko "esikhulu", cwangcisa ixesha lokwenza oko
Awuyi kuba nayo intetho enemveliso ukuba omnye wenu ungxamile uphuma ngomnyango uyokungena emsebenzini, indlu yipopsy-turvy kunye nabantwana bekhalela ingqalelo yakho, okanye unemizuzu emihlanu kuphela yokuhlala phantsi kwaye uvakalise ngokwakho.
Endaweni yoko, misela ubusuku bomhla, uqeshe umntu oza kuhlala phantsi, uphume endlwini uye kwindawo ezolileyo engenaziphazamiso, kwaye uqalise ukuthetha. Unokuphumla, usazi ukuba uneeyure ezimbalwa ukuzinikela kule ngxoxo.
2. Qala ngamabinzana afudumeleyo
Uzenzele ixesha lokuthetha ngombandela obalulekileyo nomyeni wakho.
Unokuba ukulungele ukungena ngaphakathi kwaye uqhubeke nengxoxo. Umyeni wakho, nangona kunjalo, unokufuna ukufudumeza kancinci ngaphambi kokuba aqalise ukukhupha lo mbandela. Ungamnceda ngokuqala ngoncedo oluncinci.
Ukuba uza kuthetha ngezimali zekhaya, uvule incoko ngo “Yintoni ekukhathazayo kakhulu malunga nendlela esiphatha ngayo imali?” kubhetele kunokuba “Sophulwe! Soze sikwazi ukuthenga ikhaya! ” Umntu wangaphambili ummema ngokufudumeleyo kwingxoxo. Le yokugqibela iyazinzisa kwaye iya kumbeka ekuzikhuseleni kwasekuqaleni.
3. Yitsho into oyifunayo, kwaye uqhubeke nesihloko
Uphando ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo zokuthetha kwamadoda nabafazi lubonisa ukuba abantu basetyhini bathanda ukugqithisa xa bechaza ingxaki okanye imeko efuna ukulungiswa.
Ukuba uyaqhubeka kwaye uqhubeke, uzisa amabali ahambelana noko, imbali eyadlulayo okanye ezinye iinkcukacha ezinokuphazamisa kwinjongo yencoko, umyeni wakho unokukhuphela. Kulapho unokufuna ukunxibelelana "njengendoda," kwaye uye kwinqanaba ngokulula nangokucacileyo.
4. Bonisa indoda yakho ukuba uyivile into ayithethileyo
Kubalulekile ukuba uqinisekise into eyabelwe umyeni wakho kuwe.
Amadoda aqhelile ukuthetha, kodwa bambalwa abaqhele umphulaphuli wabo evuma ukuba bayivile into ethethwayo. "Ndiva ukuba ufuna sibe ngabaphathi abangcono bemali" ibonisa umyeni wakho ukuba ujolise kule nto ayithethayo.
5. Ukusombulula ingxabano: Yilwa ngokungenamkhethe
Zonke izibini ezitshatileyo ziyalwa. Kodwa abanye balwa ngcono kunabanye. Ke, unxibelelana njani nomyeni wakho kwiimeko ezigcwele ungquzulwano?
Xa ungqubana nomyeni wakho, gcina izinto zilungile, kwinqanaba, kwaye usiya kwisisombululo. Sukungxola, ulile, udlale umdlalo obekek 'ityala, okanye usebenzise amabinzana anje athi "WENA UHLALE usenza [nantoni na ayenzayo ekucaphukisayo]" okanye "AKUKHO [nantoni na ongathanda ukuba ayenze]". Ufuna ukunxibelelana ngokucocekileyo, ujongane nesihloko esisisiseko songquzulwano kwangoko, kwaye uchaze ukuba zeziphi iimfuno zakho kunye nendlela onqwenela ukusombulula ngayo.
Emva koko jikela kumyeni wakho uze umbuze ukuba ubona njani ukungqubana.
6. Sukumenza aqikelele ukuba ziyintoni na iimfuno zakho
Kuqhelekile kubafazi ukuziva ukuba abanako ukuvakalisa iimfuno zabo.
Ukubeka ubuso obuhle kodwa ngokufihlakeleyo ukuziva ulwa ngaphakathi yindlela eqinisekileyo yokuhlala ubambekile kwimeko. Amadoda amaninzi aya kubuza “Yintoni engalunganga?” uxelelwe kuphela "Akukho nto. Akukho kwanto." Uninzi lwamadoda luya kuyithatha loo mpendulo njengenyaniso, kwaye baqhubeke. Uninzi lwabasetyhini, nangona kunjalo, luya kuqhubeka nokujongana nengxaki ngaphakathi, kude kube yimicimbi eyakhayo kwaye, njengompheki woxinzelelo, ekugqibeleni kuqhuma. Umyeni wakho akangomntu ofunda ngengqondo, nokuba angakwazi kangakanani.
Unoxanduva lokuchaza nantoni na eyenzekayo ngaphakathi kuwe. Yeyakho.
Ngokunxibelelana ngokunyanisekileyo nangokunyanisekileyo nomyeni wakho, usondela inyathelo elinye ekusombululeni nantoni na ekukhathazayo.
7. Chaza iimfuno zakho ngokuthe ngqo nangolwimi olucacileyo
Oku kuhambelana nencam inombolo yesithandathu. Kuba abantu basetyhini bafundiswa ukuba ayibobufazi ukuthetha ngokuthe ngqo, sihlala sibhenela kwizicelo "ezifihliweyo" ezithatha umgqithi-khowudi ukucacisa. Endaweni yokucela uncedo lokucoca ikhitshi, sithi "andinakujonga kule khitshi lingcolileyo ngomnye umzuzu!"
Ingqondo yomyeni wakho yeva kuphela ukuba "Uyayicaphukela ikhitshi elonakeleyo" kwaye hayi "Mhlawumbi ndingamnceda ayicoce." Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokucela umyeni wakho ukuba akunike isandla. “Ndingavuya xa unokundincedisa ukucoca ikhitshi” yindlela eyamkelekileyo kwaye ichazwe ngokucacileyo yokucela umyeni wakho akuncede.
8. Amadoda enza ngcono xa uwavuza ngemisebenzi yawo elungileyo
Ngaba umyeni wakho wakunceda ngomsebenzi wasekhaya ngaphandle kokuba umcele?
Ngaba uthathe imoto yakho wayokuyicokisa ukuze kungafuneki? Khumbula ukubonisa ukuxabisa kwakho zonke izinto ezincinci nezikhulu akwenzele zona. Ukusuka kumbulelo osuka entliziyweni kumbhalo ozaliswe luthando othunyelwe kwifowuni yakhe, akukho nto iqinisa iintshukumo ezilungileyo njengokuqonda.
Enye yezona mpendulo zilungileyo kumbuzo othi, "unxibelelana njani nomyeni wakho?" inika ingxelo eyakhayo kwaye ngesisa yamkela neyona ncinci imizamo.
Impendulo eyakhayo ivelisa amanyathelo aphindaphindiweyo, ke yiphani imibulelo kunye nezincomo kwimisebenzi eyenziwe kakuhle.
Ngelixa kuhlala kubonakala ngathi amadoda nabafazi ababelani ngolwimi olufanayo, ukusebenzisa ezinye zeengcebiso ezilapha ngasentla kunokunceda ukuvala umsantsa wonxibelelwano kwaye kukuncede unxibelelane ngokufanelekileyo nomyeni wakho. Kwaye njengokufunda ulwimi lwasemzini, kokukhona usebenzisa ezi ndlela, kokukhona uya kukwazi ukuzibonakalisa ngeendlela umyeni wakho anokuziqonda kwaye azithande.