Umxholo
- 1. Yenza abantwana bakho bazive bebanjiwe ngokweemvakalelo
- 2. Awungekhe ubathande kakhulu abantwana bakho
- 3. Chaza ukuba kuza kwenzeka ntoni rhoqo ukuze bazive bekhuselekile
- 4. Nyaniseka kodwa khumbula ukucacisa izinto ngendlela elungele abantwana
- 5. Vumela abantwana bakho ukuba benze igalelo kodwa ulawule indlela abanikela ngayo
Ukwahlukana okanye uqhawulo-mtshato akukho lula kuye nakubani na obandakanyekayo. Wena, iqabane lakho kunye nabantwana bakho nonke niya kuba nemicimbi yabo ejikeleze imeko.
Amaxesha amaninzi abantwana bashiyeka ukuba bajongane nokunye okuninzi kunawe, okanye baxoxela. Oko kungabandakanyi nje ukujongana nomzali omnye aphume- kodwa ikwabandakanya ukujongana nemfesane yabo ngenxa yosizi lwabazali babo, uloyiko lwentlalontle yabazali babo, imibuzo engaphendulwanga kunye nokuba ngumongi.
Ewe yonke le micimbi, ukuba ayisingathwa ngokuchanekileyo, inokuba nefuthe elibonakalayo kwingqondo engaphuhliswanga yengqondo kunye nenkqubo yeemvakalelo kwaye ibenze ukuba badlule konzakaliso olungeyomfuneko kwaye bacaphuke kwaye babangele ukuzithemba okuphantsi.
Akukho mzali ufuna ukubeka abantwana bakhe kwixesha elinzima kangaka, ke kwimeko yokwahlukana, nantsi indlela onokwakha ngayo ukuzithemba kubantwana bakho ngexesha lokwahlukana.
1. Yenza abantwana bakho bazive bebanjiwe ngokweemvakalelo
Xa ungekho kakuhle, umntwana wakho uya kuba nexhala lakho.
Ngamanye amaxesha kulula ukuvumela umntwana wakho ukuba akunike uthando nenkxaso oyinqwenelayo. Kodwa ngokwenza njalo, bakubambe ngokweemvakalelo hayi ngenye indlela.
Ukwenza umntwana azive ebanjwe ngokweemvakalelo yindlela yakudala yokunyanga ukubuyela kwimeko yesiqhelo kwaye ukuba wonke umntu, abantu abadala babandakanyiwe, baziva bephethwe ngokwasemphefumlweni, baya kuziva bekhuselekile, bekhuselekile kwaye beqinisekile kumava abo ehlabathi.
Ayingomsebenzi womntwana ukukuxhasa ngokweemvakalelo, ngumsebenzi wakho, njengabazali ukwenza ukuba abantwana bakho bazive bebanjiwe ngokweemvakalelo nokuba awuziva unjalo.
Ukwenza njalo, kufuneka nje ubaqinisekise, ujonge iimvakalelo zabo, uphephe ukukhala ebantwaneni malunga neengxaki zakho, ubavumele ukuba bathethe nawe ngendlela abaziva ngayo kwaye ubaqinisekise ukuba bayakubona ulila okanye ukhathazekile.
Nokuba imisebenzi yokomfuziselo efana nokuthenga okanye ukukhetha iibhedi zeteddy kwilungu ngalinye losapho (iqabane lakho libandakanyiwe) inokunceda.
Ukwenza njalo, ilungu ngalinye losapho lithanda iibhere ezimele umzali okanye umntwana, kwaye emva koko utshintshe yonke imihla kuya kuvumela umntwana ukuba akukhathalele kunye neqabane lakho ngendlela ebalungeleyo ngelixa ulwamkela uthando lwakho kwaye ukhathalelo lweebhere ezineeteddy.
2. Awungekhe ubathande kakhulu abantwana bakho
Abanye abantu babonakala ngathi bacinga ukuba akufuneki babonakalise uthando kakhulu kubantwana babo kuba oko kunokonakalisa umntwana wakho okanye kubenze buthathaka.
Ukubonakaliswa okusempilweni kothando nemfesane (ezingabandakanyi ukuthenga izinto njengentetho okanye ukunikezela kwimida yakho) kangangoko kunokwenzeka kuya kumnceda umntwana wakho akhule ngokuzithemba kwaye abenze bakwazi ukujonga utshintsho abahlangabezana nalo kubomi babo basekhaya.
Eli licebo elinokunceda nawuphi na umntwana ukuba akhe ukuzithemba nokuba akukho kwahlukana kwiyunithi yosapho.
3. Chaza ukuba kuza kwenzeka ntoni rhoqo ukuze bazive bekhuselekile
Xa inkqubo yakho itshintsha, kunokwenza umntwana azive engakhuselekanga kuba engazi ukuba kwenzeka ntoni imihla ngemihla, ngelixa ngaphambi kokwahlukana babeqhele ukusebenzisa iipateni zakho eziqhelekileyo ebomini.
Bancede ngokuzama ukubagcina kwimigangatho yesiqhelo kangangoko kwaye nangokubhala ixesha elifutshane leveki kunye nosuku oluzayo. Ukuchaza ukuba bazakuba phi, bazakwenza ntoni kwaye ngubani (umzekelo, ngowuphi umzali okanye ilungu losapho eliza kuba nabo).
Yakha ukuzithemba nangakumbi kubantwana bakho ngexesha lokwahlukana ngokongeza umzali ongekhoyo kwishedyuli ukuze umntwana azi apho akhoyo loo mzali kunye nento abayenzayo njengoko iya kubabamba ngokwasemoyeni kwaye ibaqinisekise.
Qiniseka ukuba ishedyuli ibekwe emakhayeni abo bobabini abazali ukuze ibe yinto umntwana anokuxhomekeka kuyo xa eziva engakhuselekanga nokuba kungaphakathi okanye malunga nawe nolonwabo kunye nokuphila kweqabane lakho.
4. Nyaniseka kodwa khumbula ukucacisa izinto ngendlela elungele abantwana
Abantwana bazi ngaphezulu kunabantu abaninzi ababanikeza ikhredithi, kodwa le meko iyothusa kuba ngelixa bayazi inyani, engaphezulu kokuba ucinga, kodwa abanabo ubukrelekrele bemvakalelo bokuphatha into abayaziyo ngendlela yabantu abadala yenza, abantu abadala bahlala bekulibala oku.
Kubalulekile ukuba uchaze okwenzekayo kubantwana bakho kubandakanya ukujongana nesizathu sokuba ukhathazeke kodwa ukubaqinisekisa ukuba usizi luza kudlula kwaye ulungile. Kuyafana nangokuchaza ukuba kutheni nisahlula.
Babonise indlela yokujongana neenkxalabo zabo kunye nawe, kwaye ubafundise indlela yokuchaza iimvakalelo zabo kuwe.
Itshathi elula enobuso obubonisa iimvakalelo ezahlukeneyo ezinokuthi zitshintshelwe kwitshathi iya kubanceda ukuba bakuxelele indlela abavakalelwa ngayo, kwaye baya kukuvulela phantsi ukuze uxoxe nabo ngezo mvakalelo.
Esi sicwangciso siya kukunceda wazi ukuba ungafikelela njani kubantwana bakho ngokufanelekileyo kwaye siyakuqinisekisa ukuba ukwazile ukuhlala unxibelelana nabo kwaye ubakhusela ngokwasemphefumlweni ngexesha lesiphithiphithi kuni nonke.
5. Vumela abantwana bakho ukuba benze igalelo kodwa ulawule indlela abanikela ngayo
Umntwana ongaphuhlanga ofakazela abazali bakhe ekubandezelekeni uya kuziva ekhathazekile, nokuba abahlali nawe. Onke la manqaku angentla aya kunceda ukuzola umntwana kwaye abenze bazive beqinisekisiwe, kodwa enye into umntwana aya kufuna ukuyenza kukunceda.
Abanye abazali ngexesha lokwahlukana okanye uqhawulo-mtshato baya kumvumela umntwana ukuba enze kangangoko anako ukunceda, kwaye abanye abayikubavumela ukuba baphakamise umnwe.
Zombini ezi ndlela azimncedi umntwana. Kwimeko yokuqala babaxhasa ngokweemvakalelo abazali babo ngaphezu kokuba benako ukuphatha okanye abanako ukuphatha kwaye okokugqibela, baya kuziva bengenakuzinceda kwaye bengenako nokuziva bengaxabisekanga.
Vumela abantwana bakho ukuba benze igalelo, ngokuthetha izinto ezilula ezinje, umama ufuna uncedo lwakho ngalo mzuzu, ke kusasa ngoku, ungandinceda ndondlule ibhedi yakho okanye ndingayivuyela loo nto ukuba uye walala ibhedi yakho, kwaye sonke eminye imisebenzi esinokuyenza kunye ukunceda ukugcina indlu intle.
Emva koko wabela abantwana imisebenzi efanele iminyaka yobudala (enjengokusula okanye ukusula itafile emva kwesidlo sangokuhlwa), ukubeka iithoyi zabo kude, njlnjl. nceda kwaye ubathanda kakhulu.
Le yeyona ndlela ilungileyo yokubanceda bafumane indlela yokubonisa umnqweno wabo wokukunceda kodwa ulawule ngendlela engenzi ukuba ubomi bakho bube nzima kakhulu ngexesha elinzima.