Umxholo
- Ukwazi njani ukuba ukulungele ukutshata
- 1. Ngaba ndizimele?
- 2. Ngaba obu budlelwane busempilweni?
- 3. Ingaba sineenjongo kunye neenqobo ezisisiseko esabelana ngazo?
- 4. Ngaba siyalukhulisa ulwalamano?
- 5. Kutheni ndifuna ukutshata?
Ngaba uzifumana ubuza, "Ndiza kutshata nini?" Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba ufune impendulo kulo mbuzo, kufuneka ujonge ngaphakathi kwakho kunye nolwalamano lwakho kwaye uphendule umbuzo ofanelekileyo- ngaba ulungele umtshato?
Kodwa kuqala, yintoni umahluko phakathi komtshato nomtshato?
Umtshato lithuba lokuba yindumasi yosuku, ukubhiyozela ukukhanya kokuncoma ababukeleyo, ungasathethi ke ngethuba lokusingatha itheko elikhulu. Kudala emva kokuba iintyatyambo zibunile kwaye isinxibo sakho sigutyungelwe luthuli, nangona kunjalo, kuya kufuneka uphile nezinto eziyinyani zobomi bomtshato.
Ukwazi njani ukuba ukulungele ukutshata
Nangona umtshato ungabucebisa ubomi bakho, unokuba ngumthombo wentlungu enkulu ukuba utshata nomntu ongalunganga okanye awukulungelanga ukuzibophelela.
Uluhlu lokutshekisha ukulungiselela umtshato ingaba luncedo ngokwenene ekuphenduleni umbuzo, wazi njani ukuba ufuna ukutshata umntu?
- Ukuthatha isigqibo sokutshata. Qiniseka ukuba uqinisekile, kwaye ungaxhomekekanga kwiqabane ukuba likugqibe.
- Wazi njani ukuba ufuna ukutshata umntu? Abahlobo bakho kunye nosapho nabo bayayikhuthaza ubudlelwane bakho kunye neqabane lakho, ngaphandle kweeflegi ezibomvu.
- Wena kunye nomnye wakho obalulekileyo sebenza njengeqela kwaye ujonge izisombululo zoyilo ukusombulula imiba ngoxolo.
- Unayo ukubanakho ukuxolisa kwiqabane lakho xa wenze impazamo. Yindlela yokwazi ukuba ukulungele ukutshata.
- Nobabini sukuphosa isigqibo sokushiya omnye nomnye, Ukuphepha nje ukungqubana okanye iingxoxo.
- Ukuba ubudlelwane bakho abunadrama, yeyona mpendulo ifanelekileyo ukuba ukulungele ukutshata.
- Ukuba uza kutshata kungekudala, kwaye wabelana ngokuhambelana okunamandla kwemali, ke yenye yeempawu olungele ukutshata.
- Ukulungiselela umtshato? Qiniseka ukuba ufikelele kwinqanaba apho awuseti imigibe ye-booby omnye komnye ngenxa yokungaqiniseki okunzulu. Umzekelo, "Kutheni ungandishiyanga umyalezo ngale ntsasa?", "Kutheni ungabelani ngam iphasiwedi yakho yefowuni kunye neelaptop ukuba uyandithanda?"
Ngaphambi kokuba utshate, kufuneka ufumane izizathu ezifanelekileyo zokutshata kwaye uzibuze le mibuzo mihlanu iphambili.
1. Ngaba ndizimele?
Umbuzo wokuqala olungiselela umtshato ubandakanya ukuzibuza ukuba uzimele ngokwasemalini.
Wazi njani ukuba utshate nini?
Kuyacetyiswa ukuba uzame ukuzimela xa ulungiselela ukutshata.
Ukuzithemba kuqinisekisa ukutshintsha okuthe tye ukusuka kubomi obungatshatanga ukuya kubomi obutshatileyo kunye nokuhambelana okungcono kwemali yomtshato.
Ngokukodwa kubantu abancinci kakhulu, umtshato ubonakalisa utshintsho ebudaleni. Ukuba awusele ungumntu omdala ozimeleyo utshintsho lwakho oluya kumtshato olonwabisayo lunokuba yinto enobuqhophololo.
Ngaphambi kokuba ubophe iqhina, kufuneka ube uzimele ngokwezimali-okanye uhambe kwindlela yakho yenkululeko.
Ikwangumbono ombi ukutshata kuba awufuni ukuba wedwa. Ukuphelelwa lithemba akunandima kwiresiphi yomtshato owonwabileyo, ke ukuba umtshato awuyonto ngaphandle kwendlela yokwenza ukuba kube nzima ukuba iqabane lakho lihambe, awusondele.
Iyacetyiswa - Ikhosi ekwi-Intanethi yangaphambi komtshato
2. Ngaba obu budlelwane busempilweni?
Ubudlelwane bakho akufuneki bufezeke ngaphambi kokuba utshate, kodwa kufuneka buzinze kwaye busempilweni ngokufanelekileyo. Eminye imiqondiso yokuba ubanjwe kubudlelwane obungenampilo kubandakanya:
- Umlingane othetha ngomlomo okanye ngokwasemzimbeni uyakuhlasela
- Imbali ye ukunganyaniseki okanye ukungathembeki oko akukasonjululwa
- Imbali yokunganyangwa isigulo sengqondo okanye ukuhlukunyezwa kwesiyobisi
- Inzima amathandabuzo malunga nendlela yokuphila yeqabane lakho nokuba niyakwazi ukuhlala kunye
3. Ingaba sineenjongo kunye neenqobo ezisisiseko esabelana ngazo?
Umtshato ungaphezulu kokuthandana nje.
Umtshato ubambiswano, kwaye oko kuthetha ukuba kwabelwane ngemali, iinjongo, iindlela zokukhulisa abantwana, kunye nembono yobomi.
Akunyanzelekanga ukuba uvumelane ngayo yonke into, kodwa kuya kufuneka ube namaphupha afanayo ngekamva.
Eminye imiba ekufuneka uyixoxe ngaphambi kokutshata ibandakanya:
- Nokuba uza kuba nabo nini abantwana, kwaye uzimisele ukubakhulisa njani abo bantwana
- Imilinganiselo yakho yenkolo nokuziphatha
- Iinjongo zakho zomsebenzi, kubandakanya nokuba ngaba omnye wenu angathanda ukuhlala ekhaya nabantwana bakho
- Uza kwahlula njani imisebenzi yasekhaya njengokucoca, ukupheka, kunye nokusika ingca
- Ufuna ukusombulula njani ukungavisisani
- Lingakanani ixesha olichithe kunye, nabahlobo, kunye nosapho
- Nokuba uza kuya kwiinkonzo zecawa rhoqo, imisebenzi yamavolontiya, okanye ezinye izinto eziqhubekayo
4. Ngaba siyalukhulisa ulwalamano?
Umtshato olungileyo wakhelwe kwisiseko esomeleleyo sokuthembana nokuvuleleka.
Uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo bacinga ukuba ukusondelelana kubhekisa kwisini, kodwa ukusondelelana kungaphezulu kokulalana nje kubandakanya ukwasondela ngokweemvakalelo. Ukuba awululungelanga olu hlobo lokusondela, awukulungelanga ukutshata. Eminye imiqondiso yokuba awenzanga msebenzi waneleyo kubuhlobo kubandakanya:
- Ukungakwazi ukuxoxa ngezihloko ezithile neqabane lakho
- Ukucinga ngolwazi oluthile, olunjengeenkcukacha malunga nempilo yakho, "lukhulu" okanye lusondele kumlingane wakho
- Ukugcina iimfihlo omnye komnye
- Andithethi ngosuku lwakho
- Ukungazi iinkcukacha eziphambili malunga nobomi bomnye nomnye
5. Kutheni ndifuna ukutshata?
Umtshato ungunaphakade. Ayiloqela elikhulu elilandelwa "ukuzama" ukuhlala kunye.
Ukuba awuqinisekanga ukuba unamathela kulo mntu ungcono okanye ungalunganga, nokuba kunjani, awukulungelanga ukutshata. Umtshato ucelomngeni, kwaye ukuba impendulo yakho kwimpikiswano nganye kukuhamba, okanye ukuba uyakholelwa ukuba ezinye iindlela zokuziphatha kufuneka zikhokelele kuqhawulo mtshato oluzenzekelayo, umtshato awungowakho.
Uya kujongana nemiceli mngeni emtshatweni wakho, kwaye ukuba awukwazi ukuphakama ngaphezu kwabo, uya kuba ngaphezulu nje kwelinye inani loqhawulo mtshato.
Ukulungela umtshato kukwathetha ukugudisa naziphi na izinto ezinokubangela ukuba ubuze kamva, kutheni watshata. Ndiyathemba ukuba, ukuqonda kwinqaku kuya kukunceda uphendule umbuzo, ngaba ukulungele ukutshata.
Ngaba ukulungele ukutshata? Thatha imibuzo