Umxholo
- Qhekeza intsomi malunga nothando
- Inani elikhulu labantu lihlala linamathele kumtshato ombi okanye ngeendlela ezithile
- Ukungatshati akuthethi ukuba ungonelanga
- Uxinzelelo luyamangalisa ukuba uthandane nomntu ebomini
- Isikhumbuzo esingaguqukiyo sokungatshati siphosa abantu kwi-tizzy
- Ukuzithemba okuzonakalisileyo nokuzithemba
- 1. Ukuba ngumsebenzi
- 2. Ukonwaba
- 3. Ukuba seluxolweni
- 4. Yonwaba kwaye ube noxolo xa ungatshatanga
- Kodwa ukuba nothando akusosiphelo sazo zonke iziphelo
- Sebenzela ngaphandle kwebhokisi. Musa ukulandela isihlwele kwakhona
Sihlaselwa mihla le, iimagazini, iintengiso zikamabonwakude, udliwanondlebe lukanomathotholo, iibhlog ze-Intanethi. Eyona njongo yobomi kukufumana "umphefumlo" wakho kwaye uphile ngokonwaba ngonaphakade.
Kodwa ngaba oku kuyinyaniso? Okanye ngaba yipropaganda, imveliso yolwazi oluninzi eqhubela abantu kwicala elingalunganga ebomini?
Kule minyaka ingama-28 idlulileyo, umbhali oyena mntu uthengisa kakhulu, umcebisi kunye nomqeqeshi wobomi uDavid Essel ebencedisa ekupheliseni iintsomi ngobomi, uthando kunye nenjongo yobukho bethu.
Qhekeza intsomi malunga nothando
Apha ngezantsi, uDavid uthetha ngobona buxoki bukhulu esityiswe ngabo kuluntu namhlanje, kunye nendlela yokuyichitha intsomi malunga nothando.
“Ukuza kuthi ga ngo-1996, kwindima yam njengomcebisi, umqeqeshi ngobomi, isithethi samazwe kunye nombhali, bendihamba-hamba kwihlabathi lonke ndithetha ngamandla othando ... Uthando lukaThixo ... Isizathu sobukho bethu kufuneka sibonise olo thando omnye umntu.
Kwaye, uqikelele, ndiphosakele.
Ndithengile kwi-propaganda, intshukumo yokuqonda ubunzima, ethi isifunxe sonke kule vortex, isenza isiphithiphithi kunye nomdlalo weqonga apho unokuze ukholelwe.
Intoni? Ngaba oku kukunyelisa?
Abantu abaninzi xa beqala ukundiva ndenza le ntetho, bacinga ukuba ndifanele ukuba ndiphambene kuba ndibonisa eyona nto iphikisayo oza kuyibona, uyive kwaye uyifunde kumajelo eendaba nakwiinkqubo zentetho ezithandwayo namhlanje.
Ngelishwa kuninzi, ifilosofi yam ichanekile nge-100%.
Ndiyazi njani lonto?
Inani elikhulu labantu lihlala linamathele kumtshato ombi okanye ngeendlela ezithile
Jonga ubuhlanya kubudlelwane bothando namhlanje. Imitshato yokuqala, i-55% yabo iya kuphelela kuqhawulo mtshato.
Imitshato yesibini? Iinkcukacha-manani zifunxa nangakumbi. Ngokwezifundo ezithile, ama-75% abantu abatshatayo baya kuqhawula umtshato.
Kwaye kuthiwani malunga nepesenti enkulu yabantu abahlala bexakekile kubudlelwane nakwimitshato eyoyikekayo? Kutheni bahlala?
Ewe, esona sizathu sokuba boyike ukuba bodwa. Abafuni kuthatha kwaye baqale phantsi kwakhona. Kungcono ukuba nomntu ebhedini yakhe, nokuba abanakukwazi ukumelana, emva koko babe bodwa.
Ivela phi le ntanda-bulumko?
Ukungatshati akuthethi ukuba ungonelanga
Unayo. Imithombo yeendaba, iinoveli zothando, iincwadi zokuzinceda kunye nokunye ...
Malunga neminyaka emibini eyadlulayo umnumzana waqhagamshelana nam ukuba ndigqibe ikhosi yam "ukuxhomekeka kwikhowudi kuyabulala", emva kokuba ebone enye yeevidiyo zam kuYouTube ethetha ngokuhlekisa koxinzelelo lokuba sothandweni.
Wayeloluhlobo lomntu, kwaye kukho izigidi zabantu abalandela le ntanda-bulumko, abangazange bafune ukuba bodwa.
Undixelele ngexesha leseshoni yakhe yokuqala, ukuba nangona wayesazi ukuba kukho into engalunganga ngendlela yakhe ebomini, wayekucaphukela ukuba yedwa ngoLwesihlanu ebusuku.
Emva kokuba sisebenze ixeshana kunye, wathi kum kwiseshoni enye, “David, ingaba injongo yobukho bethu kukuba sithandane nomnye umntu, kwaye enye injongo yobukho bethu kukuba singatshatanga kwaye sibe sodwa?”
Kwaye iyavakala? Nangaliphi na ixesha ipesenti enkulu yabemi ithengile kwifilosofi, silindele nje ukuba ichanekile.
Kodwa sonke asilunganga xa sikholelwa ukuba injongo yobu bomi kukuba "sithandane."
Kutheni kunjalo?
Uxinzelelo luyamangalisa ukuba uthandane nomntu ebomini
Uxinzelelo luyaqhubeka nokugcina abantu betsiba ukusuka ebhedini enye ukuya kolandelayo, ubudlelwane obunye ukuya kolandelayo, boyika ngokupheleleyo ukuba bodwa ebomini.
Ifilosofi entle xa undibuza, kwaye iziphumo zokugqibela zibonisa ukuba ndilungile.
Isikhumbuzo esingaguqukiyo sokungatshati siphosa abantu kwi-tizzy
Ukuba awutshatanga ngoku, ngaba abahlobo bakho bahlala bethetha kuwe “ungoyena mntu ubambekayo ehlabathini, ungathini ukuba ungatshatanga?”
Olo hlobo loxinzelelo, ngakumbi kwabasetyhini, lubaphosa kwi-tizzy kwaye ukuba bayayiva ngokwaneleyo baya kuthatha umntu olandelayo ahamba ezitalatweni kwaye angene kubudlelwane nabo, obuya kusilela, njengabo bonke abo bangaphambili ubudlelwane.
Ukuzithemba okuzonakalisileyo nokuzithemba
Xa uthwele uxinzelelo, ngaphakathi, kwingqondo engaziwayo, Ngaphandle engqondweni, ukuba injongo yobukho bakho kukufumana umphefumlo wakho kwaye ube kunye nabo, ukuba awukho kubudlelwane obunempilo obunothando, abantu abaninzi baziva apho Kukho into engalunganga kubo.
Baye bangazithembi ngakumbi. Baza kuqala ukuthembela ngakumbi ekutyeni njengesixhobo sokuthuthuzela kwiimvakalelo zabo, okanye utywala, okanye inikotini, okanye umabonwakude ... Okanye ukungcakaza ... Andinakufumana mntu oza kuba naye, baya kuzikhathaza iimvakalelo zabo. Ukukhazeka.
Ngoku, sukundenza into ephosakeleyo, ndicinga ukuthandana, nothando, kunye nokwabelana ngesondo nayo yonke into ehamba "nobudlelwane bothando olusempilweni", kubaluleke kakhulu ebomini, kodwa ayisiyiyo injongo yobukho bethu.
Yintoni injongo yobukho?
1. Ukuba ngumsebenzi
Ukunceda abanye. Ukwenza umahluko olungileyo kweli hlabathi. Ukushiya intlebendwane kunye nomgwebo ngasemva.
2. Ukonwaba
Cinga ke ngoku, ndiyakholelwa ukuba injongo yesibini yobukho bakho kukonwaba.
Ukuba uxinezelekile ngokuba ungatshatanga, okanye ukuba ukolunye ulwalamano olonwabisayo, mna nawe siyazi ukuba akukho ndlela onokonwaba ngayo. Kwaye ukuba awonwabanga? Abantwana bakho bayasokola, kwaye nabani na osesihogweni onaye ngoku uyasokola.
3. Ukuba seluxolweni
Ndixelela bonke abaxumi bam abangatshatanga abakhwaza uhlobo oluthile lobudlelwane bothando, abanqwenela ukufumana umphefumlo wabo, ukuba ukuba uzisa olohlobo lokuphelelwa lithemba kwihlabathi lokuthandana uza kutsala umntu ophambeneyo njengokuba unjalo.
Baya kuzilahlela. Baza kuba nesizungu ngolwesiHlanu ngokuhlwa bekhangela nabani na oza kuvala isikhewu. Kwaye uza kubuyela kwi-roller coaster yobudlelwane obuqhekezayo emva komnye.
Ayiloxolo kwaphela.
4. Yonwaba kwaye ube noxolo xa ungatshatanga
Ndiyakhuthaza njengokuba ufunda eli nqaku ukuthatha eli nqaku lokugqibela entliziyweni yakho: ukuba awunakufumana ulonwabo olungathethekiyo ngokukhonza abanye, ukonwaba kwaye uxolile ngelixa ungatshatanga, awusoze utsale umntu osempilweni ukuba abe ubudlelwane kunye. Akunakuze.
Abantu abahluphekileyo, abantu abangazithembanga batsala abalawuli okanye abanye abantu abasweleyo nabangazithembanga. Iresiphi yentlekele.
Ke ingcebiso yam kubaxhasi bam nakuwe ofunda eli nqaku kukusebenzela iesile lakho ukuze ufumane uxolo lwangaphakathi ungatshatanga ukuba awutshatanga.
Ukuba ulwalamano oluhlukumezekileyo ngokwasemzimbeni okanye ngokwasemzimbeni, okanye uthandana nomntu onomlutha kwaye abayi kuyinyamekela, fumana isihogo ngoku.
Kwaye khumbula endikukhankanyileyo ngasentla, malunga nenjongo yokwenyani yobomi. Ukuba yenkonzo. Ukonwaba. Ukuzaliswa ngoxolo.
Xa unokwazi ukuba ungatshatanga, usendleleni eya ekufumaneni isizathu sesine sobukho bakho: ukuba sothandweni.
Kodwa ukuba nothando akusosiphelo sazo zonke iziphelo
Jonga abantu abanjengoMama Teresa, uYesu Krestu, uBuddha kwaye uluhlu luyaqhubeka. Abantu ababengatshatanga, hayi kubudlelwane bothando, kodwa abenze umohluko omkhulu kubomi babo nasehlabathini ngokuzinikela kwabo kwinkonzo, ulonwabo kunye noxolo lwangaphakathi.
Unokwenza ubudlelwane obunothando obunothando ngokusebenza nemibutho ukunceda abantwana abakhulisayo, abantwana abangahoywanga, izilwanyana ezixhatshazwayo, izilwanyana ezingakhathalelwanga, abantu abadala abangakhathalelwanga, abantu abanengxaki yomzimba nengqondo abangakhathalelwanga.
Uthando luza ngeemilo nobukhulu obahlukeneyo, akufuneki lube “sisithandwa somphefumlo esiya kwenza ubomi bakho bulunge.”
Sebenzela ngaphandle kwebhokisi. Musa ukulandela isihlwele kwakhona
Ngexesha elizayo xa ubona incwadi ethetha ngenjongo yobukho bethu kukuthandana nomnye umntu, yilahle esihogweni ngaphandle kwemoto yakho.
Ndiyazi ukuba kubizwa ngokuba kukulahla inkunkuma, kodwa mhlawumbi yile nto ifunekayo ukuze kuphulwe ulwazi lobuninzi, oluza kunye "nokulandela inkokheli", "nokuba yeyiphi na inkokheli leyo," oko bekusenza ukuba sicinge ukuba asonelanga eyethu.
Ukuba kukho into elahlekileyo ukuba asitshatanga, ukuba kukho into elahlekileyo ukuba asinabo ubudlelwane obunzulu bothando.
Kwaye uyayazi eyona nto ilahlekileyo xa ungafumani indlela yokonwaba wedwa? Injongo yobomi bakho. "