Umxholo
- 1. Ukusondela akusekho lula
- 2. Uyakuqonda ukuba awuhambelani ngobomi bakho bonke
- 3. Ukungathembeki
- 4. Uyasokola ukuhlangabezana neemfuno zakho zemali
- 5. Ubusele uqhekeka
Sele iinyanga okoko kwabakho ubhubhane we-COVID-19, kwaye ukutshixwa kwabekwa kumazwe amaninzi.
Akukho mntu waziyo ukuba iyakuhlala ixesha elingakanani, nokuba uluntu aluyi kuba phi esiphelweni.
Kodwa ndingakuxelela ngoku; nje ukuba izithintelo ziphelile, kuya kubakho ukwanda kokuqhekeka kobudlelwane emva kokutshixwa kwabantu abatshatileyo.
Ukuphupha engqondweni ngokuchitha ixesha kunye kuye kwajika kwaba liphupha elibi. Abanye baye babuza imiba yobudlelwane ngaphambili, kodwa ukuhlala phantsi kophahla olufanayo kubonakalise imiba enengxaki.
Into ebinyamezeleka ngokulula kuye kwaba sisiphazamiso esikhulu esibonakalise iintanda kunxibelelwano nakumahluko wobuntu, ukuphelisa ukuhambelana kobudlelwane.
Thatha, umzekelo, uCarolina, ummelwane wam, kutsha nje ufumanise ukuba uGeorge, umntu awayethandana naye, uyamkhohlisa.
UGeorge, kunye neqela lakhe lamakhwenkwe, bakhuphisana ukuba ngubani oza kulala uninzi lwamantombazana kwaye awathumele njengobungqina kwiqela le-WhatsApp.
Ukuxheleka ngokweemvakalelo kwamkhathaza kwaye kwamenza wabuza uthando lomlingane wakhe, ukugweba kwakhe, ukhuseleko, ukuzithemba kwakhe, kunye namandla akhe okuthemba kwakhona.
Ke xa konke oku kugqityiweyo, uninzi lwezibini ziya kuvavanya umngcipheko wokuba kubudlelwane obumuncu ubomi babo bonke okanye ukuthatha inyathelo elinesibindi kunye nokufuna ukuzaliseka kwenye indawo.
Kwaye ndibheja le yokugqibela iya kuba yeyona ndlela ilungileyo kuninzi. Ngenxa yokuba amava obomi ngexesha lokutshixwa kwezinto ayithandeki ebantwini abaninzi ngoku.
Zininzi izizathu zokuqhekeka nomntu, Nazi izizathu ezi-5 ezinkulu zokuqhekeka kubudlelwane babantu abangatshatanga ekupheleni kolu hlaselo.
1. Ukusondela akusekho lula
Amava okuhlala kunye kwezinye izibini ibe liphupha elibi. Ezinye iingxaki zobudlelwane ziye zanda ngenxa yokwabelana phantse ngayo yonke into yendlu.
Oku kukhulise yonke i-quirk kunye ne-oddity enokuthi ngaphambili ibonakale, ngokungafaniyo nabantu abangatshatanga abaphila kamnandi.
Elona xesha lide, abantu abaninzi bachitha ixesha labo elininzi benxibelelana nokuthumela imiyalezo. Emva koko ubhubhane wenzeka, kwaye wanyanzela abaninzi ukuba bahlale kunye nokuphazamiseka kweefowuni.
Lo mzuzu ukwenza uqonde ukuba uyintoni, bafuna ntoni, kwaye bangobani. Oko kwabonakala kukuhle kuyaphela, kwaye into engabalulekanga engazange ikukhathaze njengokuthamba ngoku iyakucaphukisa.
Uninzi lwabantu abatshatileyo abakhe bahlala kunye baya kuphela ukuziva ngathi bahlala nomntu ongamaziyo.
Kulabo abasebenza eofisini ekhaya banokungakhathaleli ukuqonda isidingo sokunikela ingqalelo kwiqabane labo, nto leyo ebhebhethekisa iingxoxo ezingafanelekanga.
Ukungakwazi ukufumana ixesha kunye nendawo kwiqabane lakho kuya kuba sesinye sezizathu zokwahlukana nje xa ukuvala kuphelile.
2. Uyakuqonda ukuba awuhambelani ngobomi bakho bonke
Ukuhambelana okugqithisileyo kukuba kutheni ubudlelwane busilela kwaye buya kuba sesinye sezizathu eziphambili zoqhawulo-mtshato emva kokutshixeka.
Lonke ulwalamano lusekwe kubomi obude kunye nakwikamva elihlala lihleli, kodwa xa kufakwa ikamva kuvavanyo, izinto zihamba ngokwahlukileyo kunokuba bekulindelwe.
Ekupheleni kwesi sifo sikaCovid-19, uninzi lolwalamano luya komeleza okanye luqhekeze.
Indawo yokuvalelwa yedwa yenza ukuba izibini zivavanye indlela yokuziphatha kwamaqabane abo ngepragmatism engqongqo.
Omnye wenu uyakuqonda ukuba iqabane lakhe ayinguye lo ufuna ebomini ngexesha lobunzima. Kuyabacaphukisa abanye abantu abatshatileyo ukuba bahlale namaqabane abo abangazichazanga iimvakalelo zabo kwakhona.
Esi sifo siza kunyanzela abaninzi ukuba baqonde ukuba azihambelani kwaye baya kulungiselela ukujongana nokwahlukana kwangaphambili.
3. Ukungathembeki
Kuzo zonke izizathu zokwahlukana emva kokutshixwa, okona kumangalisa kukungathembeki.
Enye yeenzuzo zesifo sokuzifihla kukuba ukuvalelwa yedwa kwenza kube nzima ukufihla izinto ezibonakalayo.
Ixesha elide lokusebenza, uhambo lweshishini, kunye nokuxhoma kunye nabahlobo sisizathu nje. Uninzi luya kuthatha ubhubhane ukuba luyinciphise imicimbi, kodwa kuyacaca ukuba, uninzi lwabantu luyonwabile yindlela eyingozi ngayo kwaye isagcina imicimbi.
Abantu baya kubeka emngciphekweni konke ukuba babelane ngesondo, kwanasemva kokuba bengavunyelwanga ukuba baphule isithuba seenyawo ezintandathu, ngexesha lobhubhane.
I-Ashley Madison, iwebhusayithi ebonelela abantu abafuna imicimbi, inika ingxelo yokubhalisa kwe-17,000 yonke imihla ukusukela oko ubhubhane waqala. Olu lukonyuka olubonakalayo xa kuthelekiswa nokubhaliswa kwe-15,500 kwi-2019.
Unxunguphalo kubudlelwane butyhale abaninzi ukuba babe nemicimbi yokuziva bephila kwaye bengaphantsi kwedwa ngeli xesha linzima. Ngelishwa, uninzi lusebenzisa abanye okwethutyana ukuze baphile kulo bhubhane.
Uninzi lufunyanwa ngelixa lisebenzisa i-cybersex, "ukuthatha ixesha elide ukuthenga ukutya," ukuthumela imiyalezo ngefowuni, ukuhamba rhoqo ngokuhlwa, kunye neefowuni ezingaqhelekanga ebusuku. Uninzi lwezibini ziya kuyeka xa sele ziphakamisa ukubekwa.
Njengoko uSheridan abhalayo, "Uqhawulo-mtshato lwase China sisilumkiso kwilizwe elipheleleyo elivalelekileyo." Oku, nako kuyasebenza kwizibini ezingatshatanga.
4. Uyasokola ukuhlangabezana neemfuno zakho zemali
Imali ibisoloko sesinye sezizathu eziphambili zokwahlukana. Njengokutshixwa kwabo kubethe amandla oqoqosho kunye nezemali kwizibini ezitshatileyo, ubudlelwane babo buyaphela.
E-US, ngaphezulu kwama-40 ezigidi zabantu baseMelika baphulukene nemisebenzi kwaye babanga izibonelelo. Ngelixa isibonelelo seinshurensi yengqesho sinciphisa ubunzima bezezimali, akwanelanga ukwanelisa zonke iimfuno.
Okona kubi akukenzeki. Ishishini kunye neenkampani ziya kuthatha ixesha ukuphinda ziphinde zenzeke, ezinokuthi zenzeke ngesantya esincinci kwaye ke oko kwenza ukuba kube nzima kubo ukuba baqeshwe kwakhona ngesantya esimiselweyo.
Xa iimfuno zeqabane lakho zingenakho ukuhlangatyezwa ukuze zisinde, esi sibini sizabalazela ukwahlulahlula imicimbi yemali zezona zizathu ziphambili zokwahlukana, kwaye ubudlelwane buya kuphela.
Uxinzelelo lwengqondo luchukumisa isibini, kwaye ngoku kungumbuzo malunga nokuba ukuvalelwa yedwa kuya kuphela nini nokuba kuyekwe kuyekwe.
Ngokumalunga nabantu abatshatileyo, iimeko zoqhawulo mtshato ziya kuba mbalwa ngenxa yobunzima bezoqoqosho. Ezemali ziya kuthatha ukubetha okukhulu kwabo banokuthathela ingqalelo ukuhamba nayo.
Iindleko zoqhawulo mtshato zii- $ 15,000 ngomntu ngamnye. Izityebi zinokuqhubeka nayo ngenxa yokuhla kwexabiso lemarike yemasheya, inika ithuba lokuqhawula umtshato xa iziphumo zemali zincinci.
Jonga kwakhona: Uyiphatha njani imali yakho.
5. Ubusele uqhekeka
Abanye abantu sele beqondile ukuba ubudlelwane babo babenza ububi ngakumbi kubo kwaye baqhekeka ngaphambi kokuba urhulumente aqale ukutshixa.
Ithamsanqa lafumana izizathu ezifanelekileyo zokwahlukana nentombi / nesoka labo ngaphambi kokuba bajongane nengxaki yokuhlala kunye. Abanye abantu benza amalungiselelo okuphila ahlukeneyo ukuze basebenze emva kokuba ubhubhane ugqithile.
Kulabo bakhetha ukuhlala kunye kude kube sekupheleni kobhubhane, ubudlelwane buya kuba buvuselele imilo engafanelekanga.
Ubulumko obuqhelekileyo busicebisa ukuba singangxami senze izigqibo zokutshintsha ubomi ngexesha lolonwabo kunye namaxesha oxinzelelo; Ingqondo yethu ayikwazi ukucinga ngokufanelekileyo xa iphantsi kweemvakalelo ezinzulu.
Uninzi lwabantu luya kuvuma ukuba xa intliziyo yaphukile kwaye izala, ukunika umntu isithuba kubaluleke kakhulu ekucingeni nasekuphiliseni, yiyo loo nto iinzame zokuxolelanisa umva zincinci.
Uninzi lwabantu abadibanisa okwethutyana kunye abanakuthetha omnye komnye ngaphandle kuka "hey." Uninzi lolwalamano lujamelene nexesha elinzima, kwaye ezo ziya kusinda ziya komelela.